In this episode, I am a guest on Courageous Conversation. When I sat down a few months ago; not only did I share a lot about my background, my story, and also some things that, unless you listen to a lot of me as a guest, you probably haven't heard,...
See show notes at: https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/e290-courageous-conversations-trauma-healing-coach/#show-notes
In this episode, I am a guest on Courageous Conversation. When I sat down a few months ago; not only did I share a lot about my background, my story, and also some things that, unless you listen to a lot of me as a guest, you probably haven't heard, but a lot of insight to what I think it means to ultimately go down this path to become unbroken.
I like to share these episodes with you guys because I think it gives you more insight into me, my thought process, and what Think Unbroken truly means at the end of the day. And Samantha is a phenomenal interviewer, so I felt both challenged and called to the moment, which is a really beautiful experience to have someone who does this all the time.
I hope that you'll enjoy it, take some moments, sit in it, and most importantly, what I want you to take away from this conversation that I have with her is just understanding the reality of what is ahead of your life, and that's anything that you choose my friends.
Learn more about Think Unbroken and Pre-Order my new book: Unbroken Man. Plus, learn more about the free coaching and other mental health programs. Click here: https://linktr.ee/michaelunbroken
Support the Podcast: Become a listed sponsor!
Follow me on Instagram @MichaelUnbroken
Learn more about coaching at www.HealTraumaCoach.com
Get your FREE copy of my #1 Best-Selling Book Think Unbroken: www.TraumaHealingBook.com
Samantha: Welcome back everybody to another Courageous Conversation for storytelling by the numbers, I'm your host Samantha Roberts and today I'm with Michael at Think Unbroken. He's an incredible just entrepreneur in our joined communities, I've seen him show up so powerfully and share his story in his mission, I wanted to ensure that my community got an opportunity to hear his story direct from him and really highlight just the incredible mission that you're on. Michael thank you so much for.
Michael: Thank you so much, it's a pleasure. I'm excited to be here and talk to you.
Samantha: I'm just engaged with the power I've heard you speak. So, my backstory obviously is that I didn't speak for twelve years, I was nonverbal just coming out of my car accident and fell in on myself. And so, when I hear powerful speakers articulate themselves it really gives me that leg forward, it gives me that opportunity to remember who I was before and I try not to speak about the before and the after is though the diminishing period, it was a long period, right? But it was this opportunity for me to step into kind of an awakening. And so, when I first heard you speak the first time it really like, goosebumps throughout my entire body. I'm an energetic human being when I hear somebody speak in their message really connects with me, I do feel it on an energetic level and then being able to witness kind of the commentary of the community as we all bore witness to your speaking style, it just really connected and resonated with me. So, I wanted to be sure to share you with my community today, I would love to give you the floor, introduce yourself, this mission that you're on and the powerful mentorship and community that you've guided yourself through in the last year.
Michael: Yeah, absolutely. So, the quick elevator pitch is you know, I come from a pretty traumatic background. My mom was a drug addict, alcoholic, she actually cut off my right index finger when I was only four years old, so that said precedent, right? And my step stepfather super abusive by a time that I was twelve years old, I was getting high, was getting drunk at thirteen, expelled from school at fifteen, got put into a last chance program and then they were just like here's your diploma you gotta get out of here and I thought the solution for poverty was money and so, I chase money. But I saw my best friend's getting arrested, my family getting arrested and going to jail and prison, my three childhood best friend being murdered and I thought to myself if I'm gonna go after money, I have to do it legally, I could already foresee the future I had some run ins very fortunate to even be here right now to be honest.
And I made a decision when I was eighteen years old, I said by the time in twenty one I'm going to make a hundred thousand dollars a year legally and when I was twenty, I landed a job working for fortune ten company and sure enough next to you know like , I was making that life come to a past but the thing about money which is what everybody always tells you is like it doesn't make your life better and it exacerbated a lot of problems that I have.
I was three hundred fifty pounds, smoking two packs cigarettes a day, drinking myself to sleep and I was just at rock bottom because I hadn't it done any the work, I hadn't moved through healing and trying to overcome and work through the traumatic experiences I had as a child because the way I was looked at the world was it's not a big deal, it's not a problem, just man, not put some dirt on it, get over it, stuff it down and that doesn't work; we know that doesn't work, obviously. And it led me into this place where at twenty-six, I remember this moment of being a little boy and the water company coming in turn off a water off and I went to the backyard and I took this little blue bucket and I walked across the street to the neighbor's house and at eight years old, it was the first time I stole as I turn on the spigot on the side of their house and to have water. I made this promise to myself like, Michael when you're grown up this won't be your life. And then come to pass that it wasn't my life but wasn't impoverished but I wasn't living. And I made this decision, I asked myself what are you willing to do to have the life that you wanna have? And the words no excuses just result, just like started revibrating to my body and in that moment, everything changed because I got super focused.
Look, patients had to be deployed, was eleven years ago I'm talking to you today, there's a tremendous amount of work involved. And I had to go and get serious about all the things, it serious about therapy, serious about personal development and growth and having mentors and coaches and being the only civilian in rooms school of doctors and PhDs we're getting continuing education so, I could get all these certifications and understand the impact of trauma and abuse all this while balancing life and be entrepreneur and all the other things. And then fast forward all that time later here I am telling you and I didn't sign up for this job to be honest, with this man but no part of me was ever like that'd be great let's about getting my all the time as a kid and how it impacts me my thought is. But the truth is it's a conversation that needs to be had because child abuse truthfully is the elephant in the room in western society America particularly and it impacts eighty three percent of adults, I would argue it's probably actually higher statistically, I don't know that has been studied to the length in depth that I could and I would argue it's probably closer to ninety five percent. And at the end of the day my mission, the only thing I'm obsessed with what makes me strive so greatly and the reason why I share the message and stand on the stages and do the podcast and step into this role is because I wanna end generational trauma in my lifetime, I don't want another child to go through what I had to go through, to go through the hell and back that I did and that's my mission and that's what Think Unbroken is. Can we empower people to be the hero of their own story thus creating this expansion of healing and at the end of the day making myself obsolete so that this role no longer serves a purpose.
Samantha: Yeah. It's really impactful and powerful and I can definitely say what the courageous conversations I've had over the last year for this podcast series it is the majority of entrepreneurs have some sort of abuse trauma in their life, you know, inevitably gives us the grit and the strength to keep pushing and to keep going and it is so true.
You know, as a kid of childhood molestation and a little bit of time in the foster care system, I relate to the good work that you're engaged in, it's so relevant so top of mind how many of us are damaged unnecessarily by the decisions of our family members or community members who aren't protecting our innocence. And one of the great missions that I've really engaged myself in is ensuring that we bring these topics to standard conversation, right? Past generations would bury absolutely everything down and it was as though it never happened and as an Oregonian, I resonate to that you know pull up your bootstrap and pretend nothing's wrong because that is absolutely how we live. You know, no matter what was happening, we just pretending that everything was fine and I remember having conversations with my peers in middle school and high school and just remembering the trauma that we'd all been through and how normal it was and how it's just there was nothing being done. Sometimes these communities it runs rampant and because one generation went through it they put it on to the next and it's one of those things where if we have more guided structure from individuals such as yourself who are truly educating themselves, guiding themselves, ensuring that they're speaking the good language out into the world and making sure people understand that there's a different past potentially for, that there's ways to work through the trauma, we can hopefully break these generational trends, we can break the damaging cycles.
So, I truly honor you for the good word that you dead in the communities that you engaged yourself in because that's what it does take. It requires somebody going into you know, the rooms as you said with the doctors and the other physicians because there needs to be an accessibility of community, accessibility to the person who's sharing the message. You know, a bunch of quotes coming in and saying you have a problem in your community isn't going to fix it; it isn't going to change anything somebody such as yourself who's lived in the darkness who knows that there's a different path forward who put himself in the rooms to get educated and continually certified you're the catalyst, you're one of the catalysts who can truly shift this opportunity for so many of us.
I would be curious to hear from you maybe some engagement stories when you felt that a conversation you had lifted one individual out of time, right? Somebody where you were able to connect with them and highlights them maybe a tip tool that was able to reframe that damage and pull them into a new way of thinking.
Michael: Yeah. You know it happens every day and then part of that is because of one for lack of better way to phrase it, a mass people who care to listen to what I have to say. And in the beginning, it was like, everyone we started at zero and there were no followers, there were no books, I hadn't done anything, I was just like I'm gonna try to do this and there's been a magnitude of conversations over the years that I could point to but I think more importantly it's about what I would say is understanding something look beautiful about human beings and that we all want to believe in ourselves. And sometimes in that process we need somebody as a catalyst to just show us what's possible, to show us that one step at like, I think about this all time, I'm not somehow head of anyone, I don't know anything anyone doesn't know, I just happen to be one step forward and that's how I look at the communities I'm involved in, that's why I have mentors, that's why I have coaches, that's why I have all these people in my life because I'm always looking forward that person is just that one little thing right in front of me that I'm striving towards. I think the greatest thing that I'm able to do is to have conversation – you heard fascinating; I'll share this with you because it happens all the time. People will message me and I will respond to them and they will go, I can't believe you actually responded like, they're somehow in shock I’m a human being like, I'm not somehow greater than, I'm equal to and I am a peer in this, now sure you can call me a leader, fine, so be it, you know, you have to take that title if you're gonna step into these arenas but I'm a peer, I'm on the mission too, I'm on this journey too. So, I think the most impactful thing that I do since you asked me is, I respond to people, I am engaged with people, I want people in my community to be seen, whether I have a one follower or a million I write one book or seven thousand it doesn't matter to me like, I wanna show you because I felt invisible for so long, I felt voiceless for so long, I felt like nobody gets this and nobody understands and then what I recognize and understood is that there's eight billion people on planet earth, chances are somebody's been through this too. And I think that unfortunately there are a lot of people in this space because (a) it is full of snake oil salesman which pisses me off in a way you can't even understand I'm sure you can and (b) this is not about Michael. When I get on stages, I say the names Dom, David, Tyler, Tiara, those are my siblings. I saved those names to remind me why I do this. I don't do this for me, I don't do this for money and don't do this for fame and I'll do it for anything other than to show people what's possible.
When I wrote that book, I wrote the book because it was what I needed. When I started this journey and I assumed someone else would need it as well and so even though people go, who do you think you are to write a book? And the grammar sucks and you didn't even graduate high school, straight F’s some, blah, I'm like what does it have to do with me? Right? That's not like how do I serve people like. how do I show up? And I think to and I know this is a long answer your question but the number one thing that I think that I do is I respond as much as humanly possible, I am only one person but as much as humanly possible. I'll send people a voice now, I'll send people the response to the email, I'll take care of when they wanna get in the programs and they can't afford it, I will do whatever it takes to give people what they need to move forward because every single moment that I move forward in creating expansion is one step closer that I become to being obsolete.
Samantha: Yeah, I really resonate with that. And just stepping outside of our own trauma because we can be and you said it clearly the voice for the voiceless, that is definitely in someone who muted my own voice being that catalyst and conduit for other people to share their message and their story. I mean that's why every single day I'm in these greatest conversations because I know that time and darkness for me gave me special skill set to be able to see and hold space for others. I know what it's like completely diminished myself and deplete my capacity in this world and it takes one to no one, right? And I think that's really the platform I live through is by owning my trauma and owning the things that I've come through; I know that I can hold space for someone who has not yet received the tools to do it for themselves right. The tools that made a big difference for me and understanding the language and the patterns.
When we look at mental health, there are patterns that come up and once we know them, we can reflect into them and see how we can alter what it is we've come through. I know for me, I didn't realize that my strength in resilience was defense mechanism, I had no idea, right? I had no connection to the fact that was a defense mechanism and that was something that can be worked through, that could be you know leveraged the strength for somebody else, lean into to me, I got you today because I know where you've been is something I've certainly started to live through. And I think what's really impactful about when we share our story, so that we can step out of it, right? I know for me when I was bearing my story down deep and I wasn't sharing any part of it, the damage has an amplifying effect. One thing is a trigger for another, one diminishes is a catalyst for another and when I started to get around individuals who courageously held their story rather than the community environment where I was in where everybody had a story and everybody squashed it. I started to feel myself unlocked, I started to feel this compounding effect of strength from a different emotion and I think that's really powerful for us to realize that the emotions that come out of trauma can be strength for a different reason rather than the darkness that they caused in that time. And the more that we openly and transparent share these journeys, the more that we can help our brothers and sisters unlock. I know my siblings they didn't talk about the trauma that we went through at all until they were in their twenties and you can see the implications of it and their lives and we can see how by me facing it just a little bit earlier, right? I was able to step into a different frame of mind and I'm an imperfect human, it's a long journey, it's one of those things that we continue on. But I do find it really compelling that just being in communities where we normalize that this trauma has happened so that we can come together and create new avenues to amend it is incredibly uplifting and powerful. And that connection you gave of the nearly eight billion people on this planet, yes, somebody has been through what you've been through, I think one of the great isolating factors of trauma that you think that you're alone because you've isolated it, because you buried it, because you've diminished yourself through it, and once we start to realize that others are experiencing similar things have experienced similar things in their lives, it truly does take the weight off, it takes the weight off the story, it takes the weight off the trauma and it opens up the conversation. What are some greatest conversations you've been having with leadership, individuals and leadership capacity that you find beneficial as catalyst for creating momentum and change in our communities?
Michael: Yeah, it's a good question. And community has everything, right? I think about so much of this journey and the process of like, actually creating change, being invoked by being an association with people who are like, okay, cool I'm there with you, I've had that experience, right going through individual therapy like, well served purposes was great and while going through individual coaching well, last served purposes it was great but like, stepping in the community with intention and clarity about why you are there – in my experience serve such a greatest as greater purpose as being a catalyst to exponential change because we're communal species by nature, I mean we need support, we need to not be alone it's the same reason why if babies aren't held they die, right? I mean, we have to be a part of human connection because that is what we are and while we may not have the same features or same accent or same whatever we are innate still of the same. Like, I think people fail to realize that because it's a diversive world that we live in consideration of the times and in consideration of the way that people are meant to understand that we should preface everything with the color of your skin and the quality of clothing and the car you drive and shit that doesn't matter. And when you remove yourself from that and you understand at the end of the day like, you're going to die so you might as well be along with people who are there to support you, to commend you to at times meant you and to bring you along with them then you understand something really powerful and that is that you in fact you are not alone. But there to answer your question going some more us but to get to that place you have to first understand this thing called acknowledgement to look at and take your life into consideration in a way that you say, yes, some bad things happen to me but no, I'm not culpable because the reality is like, you're not responsible for the stuff that happened you as a child, that's a hard thing because people don't understand that until they understand that and I can't force feed that into anyone, and with that accountability of removing culpability because there is a level, you have to hold yourself accountable to and go this isn't my fault, I know that sounds crazy but in practice it works and you just have to like step into it more. And when you do that more and more and more what you recognize is that you have this unlimited potential because you remove the weight that's carried from this idea that you've associated that the bad things that happen you are your fault you step into this sense of freedom, for lack of a better way to phrase it and within the context of that freedom you start to tap into this thing called vulnerability and within vulnerability you create connection, right? And I talk about community, connection, commitment.
And connection a huge part of it because as you become vulnerable you connect with people in a way that they relate and they go, oh, wow, I understand that because that is my experience in my journey. When it comes to leadership, I think vulnerability is at the baseline of how you become an effective leader, of how you create change, of how you use your words to impact the world because holding it in pushing it down getting over it putting some dirt over it pretending that things aren't wrong in the business, pretending that life is perfect, pretending and just in general pretending is going to destroy you, it's gonna destroy what you've built, it's gonna just destroy everything around you and I'm not saying that there's not uphill battle in that and there's not spaces where you must protect your employees or you must protect your community and you must keep things close to the chest because most certainly you do because that's the nature of what being a leader is.
Then it also means having the wherewithal to be vulnerable in the times in which you need to be a leader, an actual leader not this idea people throw the word leader around so much but they're not leading it, not doing anything, not impacting anything, right? A leader as a person who will fall on the sword and give the spoils to their team, right? That's to me as being a leader and in that you have to come and to realize I think about this every day, you know and I have different businesses, I have different things that I'm involved in, it's not about me, it's about my team it's about can I employ someone? Can I help someone make their life better whether they work for me overseas or next door or in my own off like, it doesn't matter to me but one thing that matters is can we empower people.
And people want to be with leaders who are vulnerable so that they feel safe to step into the conversation about what's happening in their life. You see, corporate America's ruin being an employee for people, right? There's nothing wrong with being an employee, right? I don't you know people go have must be an entrepreneur for this thing but you can be an amazing number two or number three or CMO or VP or whatever you don't always have to run the show but who wants to work with someone who's not willing to be real, right? America taught me something really beautiful like, working for a fortune company at twenty years old which is kinda chaotic, taught me something really amazing and what that is; is that corporate America has forgotten that they're the one who needs you as opposed to it being the opposite and I think if people knows and not only just in business but in your communities, in your churches and your neighborhoods at the rec center, at the basketball court, everywhere.
If leaders’ people who view themselves as leaders are willing to step into vulnerability, you will be able to be a more effective leader because people actually care what you have to say. I don't wanna be with someone who wears a mask all day like, that's not being human being and I want connection, wanna be a part of that connection, I wanna be part of the community but as a leader you gotta commit to it and be willing to face your faults and you gotta be willing to speak your voice you gotta be willing talk about the hard things because I don't know that it's ever easy, I don't know that it ever gets easy, right? And that doesn't mean it's always hard, that doesn't mean it's always tremendously difficult, sometimes you're just in the middle but how do you create anything of impact of scale of change of value of anything without first being like this is who I am?
Samantha: I really resonate with that, definitely having come through New York City, corporate America we are inherently cut throat ruthless and you're taught how to wear a mask every single day. The way that you speak, the way you wear your hair, the colors you wear all of it is dictated and I don't say dictated in a casual format, I mean truly if you step outside the box on any given day which is an entirely just a way to lead your people, right? It does not serve the greater good and I understand that of the forties and fifties when or I mean of the eighties went on corporate America really took off in a big way, you were streamlining and system the energy in the environment so that you could ensure standardized results. But as technology has adapted and amended there's no longer need to systematize your people, the skill set and the ingenuity comes from their unique path, they're unique point of view. When you amplify the potential of a human being based on their unique expertise that's when these businesses have an opportunity to really flourish and grow and I did opt to exit corporate based on that masking that was required every day. And seeing incredible human beings in leadership position in leadership capacity diminished themselves on a consistent regular basis because they thought exactly as you pointed out, removing their own humanity was the only way to excel in their line of work. And for me, I believe in the individual experience so much that wasn't something that I could stand for, I'm incredibly good at what I do in data analytics and strategy but to see a dear friend of mind diminish herself on a regular basis because that's what she found required for her senior leadership position, it's heartbreaking and it's interesting the usage of the word culpable and removing that diminishing factor from our sense of self, right? Yes, we take ownership of it so that we can reframe it as a gift or as leverage into serving others, I think that's incredibly poignant. And I dig into it, I think it's really compelling to sit in that space where we are in the need of the reframe, we have these experiences within our culture that are underserved; are under serving us and until we normalize the conversation bring them to forefront, I mean the times won't change but we all gifted with this 2020 reset where we're choosing self-worth again or maybe for the first time in our adult lives we're choosing capacity to be bring awareness to what it is we stand for.
I know for myself it was a true awakening opportunity for me to see here's some bad habits that I'm allowing to maintaining in my life, right? And I think some of the points that you made about vulnerability as the baseline and leadership that connects so powerfully for me and through these courageous conversations that I've had with all these leaders from around the world vulnerability truly is becoming normalized across both sexes which I think is a powerful reframe that we're gaining in recent years. What are your thoughts on really just courageous this conversation across both sexes and how they're adapting and changing in recent years compared to the solid that are our men were forced to live through before?
Michael: Yeah, I mean we're just starting, you know, I can look at my analytic, I look at my data all the time being, I gonna call it infatuated and but curious and I'll dive in, I look at everyone who does everything involved with my companies and then Think Unbroken it's eighty one percent female driven and the initiatives that I have for including men in the conversation at scale are I wanna use a tedious because you look at and you measure you go, damn guys, like come on, it's fine, but I get it right? And I look at it and I go; I understand where this comes from because I was a part of that for years. And so, I think we just need more men to step up but also on the other side of Samantha which is a caveat that people don't talk about enough that I think is a huge catalyst and why men don't is that there is now this shift in culture with a lot of women where there's judgment cast to men who are vulnerable. And now women are calling them we it used to be just like guys calling each other weak but now you start to see it from women as well and I go well that's not really conducive to anything practical for anyone like, we have to give each other the space and look that's hard, that's difficult because we're told it like just take a pill for it, why are you complaining me? Take the pill, you're fine, right? This pharmaceutical industry is like corrupting what we're capable of doing and I think that people are looking for the short-term fix so often that its cannibal recognizes your ability to actually heal. And I think at the crux of the conversation is we have to all speaking of being leaders lead by giving people permission to show up as they are. Now that doesn't mean we don't have to push people, that doesn't mean we don't have to call people out on their bullshit because we most certainly do and I want that to, the people around me know like call me out please let me know but at the end of the day like, if we're not giving each other the space and holding space doesn't mean for me and it's different for everyone it doesn't mean you just to come out and lay all your crap out on the floor and not do anything about it; it means perfect, I'm here to support you, now what are you going to do about it, right? Which I think is really a part of it and we have to get to this place where being masculine isn't tied to somehow being a robot and I think we're moving towards that more but I think we're in its infancy, I don't know that whatever this revolution is and I don’t know the revolution is necessarily the right word but whatever it is that is the swinging of the pendulum to the other side and creating the space where men can have a conversation, I think we're a long way away, right?
One of my best friends, we're no longer best friends, you know, I think when you grow people will separate and those things happen but I was best friends with my best friend for a very, very, very long time and we hugged three times in the entirety that I knew him and it was so incredibly uncomfortable for both of us and now I just hug my best friends all the time, male and female doesn't matter like, I wanna be in connection with people but also here's the other thing that I think is important too is like to not be an alignment with people who don't support who you are as an emotion human being because if your conversations back and forth and this exists within the context of, I assume being a woman, I don't know because I am not one but I assume on both sex, in all sex however you identify it doesn't matter but as a human being there's that juxtaposition of creating acceptability and having a framework to have the conversation without judgment. And I think that's what's missing, on both sides. And so, yes, we're in this position where it's starting to take a step forward but we're still miles away from what I think we have the potential to do.
I think that when we get closer to empowering each other to have these conversations at scale without judgment, without shame, without guilt, without people going and talking shit behind your back and without people stopping renewing your tracks and going well, you should just go to therapy or take the pill or poison yourself with alcohol and go party it away all night and I can go on and run on. But ultimately at the end of the day I think what it is about, can we step into it and again that's word vulnerability comes up in another way but not in this way where it's first, not where it's so far-fetched that your vulnerability is impossible which I think happens undeniably all too often but instead to set you know I'm having a bad day, I need spare like whatever's is going on in this job, whatever going on in this business, going on this relationship, whatever is going on in this community I'm having a bad day, I don't wanna deal with you guys, I need to go take care of myself and not shame people into that or force people to bite through it either way. Now there's also a space for a conversation to say, are you taking it easy or are you taking care of yourself? And that's a different conversation but ultimately, I think it all comes down to we have to increase our communication with each other and do so in a way that allows people to just be people.
Samantha: Yeah, absolutely. I really resonate with that. I'm someone who didn't cry until was eighteen years old and I actually learned my emotion from my artist and creative friends in New York city are in my twenties and now I've really tapped into the power of emotion and being someone who grew up without it, I resonated more with the masculinity side of my community rather than the feminine side and I'm learning femininity now which is fascinating really to see just the power of vulnerability is really what you know so many of us associate feminine be with but vulnerability and innate shrink, there's an incredible strength to both to vulnerability from either sex. And I've noticed in my community I truly do attract men who are in tune to their emotional strengths and their emotional well-being and I feel very blessed that I've engaged myself in a community where we're open both feminine and masculine to the power of emotion. Especially because I'm a late add to that arena, right? As someone who didn't know the complexity and the strength that comes from vulnerability, you know, my mask always had been that I'm strong, I'm resilient, you can throw anything at me and I will always learn on my feet. When I discovered that there's more strength and vulnerabilities and strength and being resilient my life transformed, my life completely transformed because it was a powerful reframe that I needed and then I noticed that when I stepped into that space, I was attracting all these individuals who had the complexity of their emotions as something they've been introspective on, right? That good work you talked about of, are you resetting your emotional strength and do you need to step away? It's okay to step away, it's okay to refill your cup, it's okay to refill your reservoir, it's okay to tell your friends that you need some time. And again, this is something that so many adults across the nation, across the world have never been gifted the opportunity to be vulnerable in their own capacity and say that you know, I'm not okay today, that's one of the things we talk about so much in these courageous conversations is the fact that it's okay to announce when you need help. It's okay to raise your hands say, I need my community support right now, it's okay to allow yourself the vulnerability of openness; of openly sharing and lifting others through that capacity as well. I mean we've touched on so many beautiful components and elements of courageous conversation in today, Michael, I'm incredibly grateful to you for the stance that you're taking in this arena and the space that you hold. I'd love to give you the floor for final call outs and opportunity, for this community to reach into you and understand how they can work together with you.
Michael: Yeah, you know, on same thing, I always tell everyone, like you know at the end of the day and I love what you said and I just wanna quote tell on it briefly, you can ask for all the help in the world but it doesn't matter if you don't do something with it. And I just want people to sit with that because it's so important, because there's no Disney moments, there's no one coming to rescue, there's no magic fairy who's gonna change your life overnight, you are going to have to do the work and I wish that weren't the case if I could make a magic pill like, your life's better, I certainly would we wanna be having this conversation but that's not how this works and that's not how we'll ever work.
And so, when you elicit into the world, I want this, I need this, I desire this, and do something with it because if you don't then, there's no point, right? And I know that's hard, it's an uphill battle, it's gonna take time just like the first time you ride a bike, you show up and someone's behind you while you're on training wheels and they're holding the back of the seat and you're scared but you go for it and then they let go but you still have the training. And then one day after you get comfortable with it you remove those and it's just you on the bike and then you fall down and then you get up and then you fall down, you get up and you fall down you get up and that is life.
The one thing I'll say is like, I'm not somehow perfect, I don't know anything anyone doesn't know and I make mistakes every single day and I use those mistakes as data points and I measure them like, okay, what can I not do tomorrow? Can I get one percent better? How can I get five percent? How can I just be more in alignment with the person that I am and my wants, needs, interest, values, boundaries and mission and motto, my everything the vision I have for the world. And with all the things people invest all the time and the stuff and they don't do anything with it. You have to show up for yourself. You have to do that, you can ask God, Spirit, Universe to come and deliver you whatever you need but to not do anything with it is asinine.
And so, that said you can find me everywhere I'm @michaelunbroken that's on all the things, but more importantly you can read my book for FREE, it's at traumahealingbook.com and yeah, it's a number one best-selling book, you wanna go buy it, go buy it but I'd rather you just read it. Do something with it, create something in your life, take it. You might be watching this right now and you're like, yow, this is what I need it, well, go do something about it.
Samantha: Really, really powerful. I've definitely shared a lot of your links in the show notes for here. I think it's really, really compelling just the conversations you're engaged in and that willingness to call people on their diminishing factor, right? It's important sometimes to have your somebody who's trusted, hold the mirror of reflection back to you and curate and create a community where the safe space is allowable for that transformation, right? That introspection it does take a lot of good work and time for you to be introspective but some of your biggest catalytic conversions in your life come from somebody holding the correct mirror in front of you in the moment when you require it. And I think you know the process is the work that you do is creating that opportunity for so many.
And so, I really honor you, thank you so much for your time today. I think you for diving into so many different areas of vulnerability and transparency and ownership of your journey and taking that opportunity to reflect for each one of us that our journey is ours because we can leverage it to do good in the world, we can remove ourselves from the baseline on the stories that our lessons coming forward I think that's incredibly transformative. The more courageous conversations you and I each have, I know that we are catalysts in our communities, I know that our transparency here today will be well received by those who are ready to make that shift that conversion in their life, it's not easy the good work, it’s hard, it's challenging, you will find dark days but when you know that you're an environment or in conversation with others who can see you hold space for you and allow that transformation to take hold it compounds and new opportunities unwrap before you. And so, Michael again thank you so much being with me today.
Michael: Yeah, it's my pleasure, thank you so much.
Samantha: Yeah, I hope everyone will reach into Michael, if he has served you powerfully if there's something in his good work that can benefit you and your community obviously, I've dropped all of his links in the chat, we're here to serve you, for everybody watching now in the future this was another courageous conversation with your host Samantha Roberts for storytelling by the numbers, thank you all so much.
Host and Author
After 12 years, mute and non verbal, following back-to-back car accidents and narrowly escaping death upon flipping a quad down a rock quarry, Samantha reached her own personal rock bottom.
Through the power of Community and Mentorship, she found her voice again and her conviction to live a life of contribution and service.
During the quarantine of 2020, she became a Grant Cardone Licensee and launched her podcast, Storytelling by the Numbers, and the Proximity is Power Summit Series.
She is committed to lifting 1,000 voices in Courageous Conversations in our newly invigorated virtual economy.