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March 15, 2023

Unlocking the Power of Personal Growth: Insights from Dr. G, the Catalyst for Transformation

Join us on this episode of the podcast as we welcome Dr Greg Pursley, also known as Dr. G, who is a renowned catalyst for personal growth... See show notes at: https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/unlocking-the-power-of-personal-growth-insights-from-dr-g-the-catalyst-for-transformation/#show-notes

Join us on this episode of the podcast as we welcome Dr Greg Pursley, also known as Dr. G, who is a renowned catalyst for personal growth. Dr G is on a mission to transform the lives of 1 million people, and he has helped many individuals overcome their limitations and achieve their goals by harnessing the power of their belief systems.

In this episode, Dr. G shares his expertise on various topics related to personal growth, including the power of investing in yourself, overcoming emotional barriers during times of crisis, exploring the role of personal stories in shaping our identity, breaking free from the past, embracing the journey of self-discovery, and mastering emotional intelligence.

As the creator of Dr. G's personal growth program, author of Fix Your BS, and owner of PC Medical Centers, an integrated regenerative medical clinic, Dr. G has a wealth of knowledge and experience that he shares with our listeners. Whether you're feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or unsure of how to reach your full potential, Dr. G's guidance will help you take simple, time-saving steps to build the life you want. Tune in to this episode to learn more about personal growth and transformation.

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Transcript

Michael: Hey! What's up, Unbroken Nation! Hope that you're doing well wherever you are in the world today. Very excited to be back with you with another episode with my friend Dr. G, Greg Pursley. Dr. G, what's up brother? How are you today, man?

Dr. G: I'm doing fantastic. Thanks for having me on the show. Appreciate you about to spread some knowledge, drop some bombs.

Michael: Yeah, I love it, man. I'm excited. So you and I connected a few years ago now, which is really fascinating to me that it's been that long. We are both, and people have probably heard me say this quite a few times on the show part of Grant Cardone's community and the 10X community, and it's funny because I was thinking about you recently because last year you said something to me, we had a quick phone call, I think actually it was like two hours. Well, we had a phone call and you and I were talking and you were like, yeah, man, you know, the first time I did this, which was the thing that I was about to do, it changed my life. And that thing that I was about to do was spend the most money I've ever spent on a single event that period of time. I spent more money on masterminds, I spent more money on other things, but I never really invested into an event to what I understand in doing so, led me down a path to be around the right people. And so, that's where I wanna start this conversation and I wanna jump off and talk about, for you, and I want you to share your story ‘cuz I know it, but I want you to share how impactful it was for you to make the decision to invest in yourself.

 Dr. G: Wow, man. What a great place to start that's for sure. Well, to give a little context, let me give you a little bit of brief history to your audience, I know you know it, but you know, I was 23 years old I graduated with a doctorate. I had a wife, a daughter, she was about a year old, two years after starting a business, our son was born with dwarfism a medical complication. So, we spent about eight, nine years, keeping him alive, keeping the family together, and not really focused on financial stuff, not focused on anything other business-wise, other than, Hey, how do we maintain and get through the week? That's what we were focused on.

So, coming out of that, it was the end of 2018, and this is when that decision was made that you're talking about, which was, I had always been the guy that bought the cheapest ticket and tried to finagle my way to the front, you know, my way to the front. But it's weird because internally you still feel like you're the guy that bought the cheapest ticket, even though you might be getting some things and you almost don't feel worthy of those things because you didn't put yourself in a position, you didn't pay to be there, you don’t do the right things to be in that position. So, I spent money, I spent over it was about 10 grand on a seat, and which I didn't have that money at the time I borrowed it. I actually had enough value that I thought it was worth it, and I thought, if I'm incorrect, I'll at least I'll pay off the 10,000 overtimes, whatever. So, bought the ticket, it was the 10X GrowthCon. And I'll never forget, man, I was sitting there, first of all, I felt like I belonged, that was new, I felt like I belonged with this people that were totally different, totally thinking differently in business in life. And I was sitting there talking to a guy and he's asking me what I do. I said, oh, I'm a chiropractic physician and I have a business and we do a few hundred thousand a year. And I said, what do you do? He goes, I'm in real estate. I said, oh, like an agent. And he goes, no, I'm an investor. And I said, oh, what's your holdings? And he goes, 2 billion. I'm sitting here talking to a guy that has 2 billion in real estate, like what? And if you know the 1% rule, it means that 1% of his 2 billion in real estate is what he's actually collecting per month in profit. Well, that was a lot more money than I'd ever seen. So, the amount of knowledge I gained from three days was well worth and even exceeded the $10,000 investment and I do it every year and multiple events, the right events, I've learned about which events, which people I'm very intentional about which people I want to be around, but I've developed some great relationships and you're of them.

 Michael: Yeah. I mean, you know, I feel super fortunate and very lucky for the fact that I've been able to connect with incredible human beings like you and like so many of the people who are in my community, because I spent a long time being like, where do I fit in, like, where do I belong? Like, what is actually happening in my life right now? And you know, I think that one of the really difficult things that people go through constantly is like, when I've been through so much and my backs against the wall and I'm having a difficult time financially and where we have family situations like yours where you literally said, we're trying to keep our child alive, right? I mean, where are you at emotionally before you make that decision to invest in yourself, were you just like, fuck it, what's the worst that's gonna happen? I mean, like, what's going through your head? And I'll pause there ‘cuz I want to follow into that a little deeper.

Dr. G: Yeah. So, you're right, I was at that, you know, who gives a sh*t mentality kind of, and I don't mean that in a bad way, I just meant like, I've been through way worse than investing some money into something that didn't work out. And so, you know, when you live almost a decade in fear every week, how are we gonna get through the week? How are we gonna make it to the through the day? All of a sudden certain thing that most people would go, that's crazy, you're like, you know, the risk associated with the potential reward to me was way different than most people would view it. I just had a different perspective, when you deal with something and I talk a lot in different groups and I've spoke on stage in front of different groups and organizations and a lot of people who have traumatic events in their lives, veterans and different people who've dealt with domestic abuse and all those things. And you gotta take things into perspective and your perspective is not the right perspective. Neither is mine. We just have different perspectives and it doesn't mean that we need to argue about our perspectives. We really need to learn about the other person's perspective and if you go into it like that as an open book, you say, man, what can I absorb out of this person? Well, I'm right ‘cause that's the ego talking man like, you don't need to argue about it. And so, that's really what it was for me, it was coming from a place of I've been through a lot worse than the potential of investing money into something that doesn't work like I thought it would.

Michael: Yeah, and we all have. I think in, you know, for myself, the investing thing, and I wanna sit in this for a moment because I don't know if this has been true for you or not, man, but every time I've done anything for free, I just don't do anything with it. Every time I go get the cheap ticket; I don't do anything with it. Like sometimes I'll just leave the room. I'm like, whatever. Right. And it's fearful. You said for a decade you guys lived in fear. How could you not? I mean, God, you live in America. Those medical bills must have been out of fucking control, right? What do we eat for dinner? How do we fill up the car with gas? You know, the van's door won't even f**king close anymore, right? And it's like everyone around you must have been like, you're about to do, what?

Dr. G: You know, it was funny. I didn't really have anybody in my corner, and there was a little bit of secrecy around it; it was like, what I learned through this process. And I can give you a three-step process of that I learned of really, how the universe, God, life, light source, energy, whatever, the higher power that surrounds us, it's in and around everything, whatever you want to call it, but how that actually works. And I'll give that those three steps to you, but this is what I learned.

Number one:

You have to make a clear vision for what you actually want. And most people have a very foggy vision for what they actually want. They justify or say, well, I can't do this or that because of where they're currently at. But you have to look into the future and say, man, what do I really want? And once I started looking into that, I decided that the life that I currently had after we didn't have to deal with the day-to-day is our family gonna stay together? Is he gonna make it type deal? It was like, oh, he's better. Now, we can focus on what normal people focus on, you know, career and life and retirement and money, and doing the things you wanna do in life and all these really cool things that we had not done for a long time. And so, I started looking at that and I was like, man, I do not wanna keep doing what I'm doing. I had a chiropractic practice. I was treating people, but that wasn't me, it wasn't who I was. And I think that's where a lot of people get stuck, they settle for something that is okay and comfortable, but I was so uncomfortable being comfortable, if you will, that I was like, I gotta do something different. I gotta do something better. I gotta do something more. So, I started to develop my clear vision for the future, number one.

Number two:

I made a definite decision that I was gonna do whatever it took and I was gonna take actions no matter what, that I was gonna move toward that clear concise vision. And what people don't realize is when you do that, the universe, God, light source, whatever you want to call it, starts to react to that and say, okay, okay. He's serious. What people don't realize in that moment, you're also gonna run into obstacles to help you become the person that you need to become in order to deserve the things you're asking for. And that's where people start to get confused, they say, oh, I guess it wasn't meant to be. Or oh, it wouldn't be this hard if it was meant to be or whatever and they justify stuff I'm like, no, that's you’re learning, so ask, what am I supposed to learn from this? What am I supposed to learn from this? Keep the clear vision, number one. Number two, take action with no matter what mentality.

Number three:

And this is where people screw up. They try to control how and when the outcome is gonna happen. You have to surrender to the process. Another word for that is faith. You have faith that it will occur because if it's coming out of you, you don't need to force it, just allow it to happen and say, I'm going to take action toward this clear concise vision. Now, I took all this information over like a five-year period since I made that decision. And boiled it down to those three steps.

So, it's gonna take a little bit of time. It's not as simple as that sounds, but what I would tell people is, man, whatever future you can create in your mind, those are the three steps that you need to take to get there. And man, that decision, no matter what mentality, that's where it all really begin.

Michael: Yeah. And for me it was in the same moniker really, no excuses, just results. It was like, I'm gonna figure this out, man. I'm not gonna be 350. I'm gonna quit smoking. I'm gonna quit drinking. I'm gonna get out of 50 grand of debt. I'm gonna figure it out no matter what. Like, or I'm gonna die, but guess what? I'm gonna die. Greg, I literally distinctly remember, I was like, I'm gonna f***ing die anyway, so I might as well live my life, you know? But here's where it's difficult though, man, because if you look at life and you connect the dots and you look at all the experiences that have led you to where you are, you know, there's a lot against you from jump, right? We have these identities of childhood, of our teens, of our parents, our teachers, that time we were on the T-ball field, like all this stuff, it just sits in us. And so, I'm wondering here, ‘cuz I want to create more context about who you are. What is a story? What is a experience a dot for you that in your childhood has shaped who you are that you don't really ever talk about?

Dr. G: Oh, man, that's a good one. So, there's a few, but the one I'll point out. So, I grew up on a farm. My mom worked, my dad worked, they were very hard workers, so I had a great work ethic from them. But it's interesting, we talk about perspective and when you talk about your childhood and when you're growing up, you make connections this equals that type of stuff, meaning, like an experience happens you say, oh, it means this, you put a meaning to it. Well, this is what happened with me. So, growing up my dad was very rigid and expected a lot of me okay. And so, nothing was ever good enough type of thing, it was like, you know, you do your best, but yet there's still something that could be picked out that could be better, it could be more. And so, I think I was 15, 16, something like that and I was playing baseball. And I had a really great baseball game, I love baseball, I'm great. And I took the school route ‘cause I looked at the statistical data but anyway, I was 15, 16, I had a great game and I was always looking for my dad's judgment, you know, positive, like, his be proud of me type of deal, you know? And I think that a lot of people can relate to that. And you know, 15, 16, and I had a great game and I was the reason why we won the game, I went three for four. I had, you know, a couple great plays defensively. I scored all the runs, RBI's or scored 'em myself and I was all excited and we get in the truck and we're on our way home and I'm like, dad, what a great game. And my dad's response was, yeah, if you would've got that last hit, you've been four for four

And so, what I took that as was, well, nothing I'd ever do is gonna be good enough and I don't matter and I'm not worthy and I'm not worth it. And that's the meaning I put to that. Now, if I would've held onto that, meaning I would've had very low self-esteem but when I met my wife, we put all the assets that I had basically on paper in a conversation, we were just talking, but basically, we listed 'em out and then she's like, so wait a minute, what's your catch? And I was like, I live with my grandma she goes, you're 20 years old, I mean, you're saving on rent that's adorable. You know, you're not 35, 40 living with your grandma, not doing anything, you know. And so, when she put that perspective, it changed my mentality of what that meant. So, all of a sudden, my dad being hard on me was, he was making me tough. He was making me strong. Look at all the assets I've developed because of that and all of a sudden there was a respect and an appreciation and gratefulness for what he did, ‘cuz he could have been a lot worse. His dad was never there. His dad was, you know, out at bars and was an alcoholic and beat his mom and all that stuff. And so, it's like, he could have done all that, but he didn't. And so, what a strong guy whereas a couple years before that, it was what a jerk, this guy's so mean, you know? He doesn't believe in me. And so that was the moment where it kind of shifted to that different perspective. And now we have a much different, much more, well, a great relationship now comparatively.

Michael: Yeah. And perspective is such an interesting word, right? Because you have this notion of an idea of like what you think reality is, and then you're in it and you get time to sit and reflect on it, and you go, nope, that's not necessarily true. You know, I think about so many interactions I've had with human beings over my life, relationships, intimate relationships, family relationships, and it's one of the things really funny, Greg, is when I was young, people would always call me coach, right? Now, obviously knowing what I do for a living these days, that kind of suits but as a kid it was defamatory, right? Kids would be like, okay, coach, whatever, douche bag a**ole. And I'd be like, look, I'm just trying to like show people capability and possibility. But what I've discovered and I think this is one of the most difficult things about understanding human potential, most people will hear things and they will perceive it as daggers when instead it's a hand to pull you up. And that was me for a long time because every time I remember, so I grew up, I love martial arts, I've wrestled since I was a kid, I did Karate, Muay Thai, the whole night, I love fighting, it's my favorite thing. And won this tournament in Westfield, Indiana of all places, and I went four for four that day, went all four matches, and at the end my coach came up to me and he was like, great job, but. And Greg, I sh*t you not, the only thing I heard was but and a week later we're getting ready for our next meet and you know, we have to weigh in and I literally, because I was like f***, I'll show you like literally that was the thought process I had the night before I ate an entire large meat lovers Pizza Hut pizza, and like two snicker bars. And I have no idea how I made weight by like an ounce and I had the worst coming off of winning a tournament that was a really hard tournament to win I lost three matches in a row and got kicked outta the tournament that day. And he sat with me and he was talking to me. He is like, dude, what is going on with you? This doesn't even make sense. And he's played 24 at that time and he's trying to explain to me, you have to understand that there's always space to be better, to grow, to improve, to go to the next level. And that was a moment for me as a kid that solidified this idea of like, will, maybe not everyone wants me to suck, right? I'm leaning into this a little bit deeper with you, Greg. Did you have to go through like reconciling those moments and those experiences with your father?

Dr. G: Well, yeah. I actually call it time traveling. You know, if you make a decision about something and you never revisit it, then that decision that you made about whatever experience or person or event stays the same. And as you grow and improve, as you get older, you should not be the same person. If you're the same person now as you were 10 years ago, you're not evolving as a human being, you're not becoming an adult, you're not developing and you should revisit those things and go, well, now that I have perspective as a father, why wouldn't I revisit that I have more life experience, I have more perspective. Why wouldn't I go back and go, well, what was his intention? Was he trying to be a jerk? No, he was trying to do the best he had with what resources he had and the example that he had, which was not great. So, you know, it just gives you a lot more appreciation so, when you're 15 or 25 or 35 or 45, those things should be revisited, you should look back. I actually, the last chapter in my book, it talks about “RIP” RIP is one of my favorite things, it stands for Retrospection, so you look retrospectively at your life, at the things that you've experienced, and you start asking questions about those things to see if there's different perspectives that you can have. Then you look Introspectively, well, what did I take from those things, those experiences, those events, those people, and how did I portray that inside and who I am I because of those and is that who I want to be? And then you project; Projection is the P.

Projection is looking into your future and saying, well, if I project it in my future, who I actually want to be, what meanings and things do I need to develop or learn or change within myself to become that person? And the reason why I love the RIP, you know, I don't know how you'd call that moniker or whatever, but the reason why I love that is because you literally have to kill the old person off, kill your old you off in order to become the new you. And see, that's where people mess up a lot, they want to keep who they are and the people they're around, and the surroundings, their physical reality, they want to keep all that the same, but they want to have new things, new money, new experiences, new relationships, new whatever and I'm like, that's not the way it works. You have to become a new person in order to deserve new things in life.

Jim Roan says it best, you get what you deserve in life, not what you want. And so, man, do I deserve, I probably want a six pack, you know, I probably want really good abs. Do I deserve 'em? Well, I don't know. Did you put in the work? Did you put in the effort? See most things in life are not as difficult as we make 'em, if we take the ego out and all of our emotional connections and baggage and all the things that we assume and we take all that out and we just take the actual factual stuff, it's really not that hard, most of the time. There's people out there making millions of dollars per year, and there's people out there making millions of dollars per year in the genre or industry that you wanna make million dollars per year, all you have to do is go find those people, figure out what they're doing. Tony Robbins says, success leaves clues. Well, those clues are the things they're doing that make them that money. So, all you have to do is repeat those actions and become the person that they currently are and understand they're just ahead of you, they just have a few things built in and done before you do. So, same thing with weight loss, same thing with having a better body, same thing with better relationships, there's people that already have those things. If you just remove the ego and the emotion and all the connections you have and the assumptions you make, if you just take all those away and just go, what could I do to have a better relationship? You know, and then you start to actually write things down. You're like, oh, that's actually not that hard. I just need to start doing them.

Michael: Yeah. And that's so much of the clarity thing you were just talking about. And here's one of the things that I think is most fascinating about life, you touched on something that is near and dear to me. When I wrote Think Unbroken, years and years ago, the one of the lines in it, in the transformation story of me is I had to take the old Michael and kill him. And that was figurative, I mean, honestly, Greg, at some point it's literal because my whole life only changed after the night, I put a gun in my mouth. So, in some context, like it's literal, but really, it's not and I think about that. There's a part of you that you gotta get rid of, it's the shame of who you used to be, it's the guilt, it's the pretending, it's the hiding the secrets, it's the doing all the things that, you know are destroying your f*** life, and it's hard. And so, I'm curious, what part for you, Greg, did you have to kill off?

Dr. G: Well, really the insecurities, the looking down on yourself. You know, just the say, I'm not good enough, I'm never gonna be enough, all that negative talk towards yourself. I had to get rid of all that. You know, it wasn't easy, you had to recognize it, figure out where it was coming from, but it's simple, it's a simple process, you just gotta pay attention, you gotta take responsibility for those things. Take responsibility for the things you're saying about yourself, you know, inside your mind. Pay attention to those things, take responsibility and go, well, is that true? And start questioning those things.

Michael: I wanna jump into that a little deeper, what does responsibility in this context mean? Because I fear I should say that a lot of people will hear this and immediately judge themselves for judging themselves.

Dr. G: Yeah. And it shouldn't be a negative thing, it means you're becoming a more evolved person, you're developing, you're growing emotionally. You know, if you don't understand your emotions and where they come from and why they're there, then you're at the effect of the emotion, they are controlling you in some sense. So, if someone or something, or an event or something happens and it just takes you on an emotional rollercoaster, then then you're at the effect of those things, you're a slave to those things. And so, what I mean by take responsibility is pay attention, understand that emotion comes from within you, emotion comes from the things that you're focused on. Once again, Tony Robbins, great reference, he talks about focus equals feeling equals’ action. So, what you focus on, which is your thought process and the things that you have decided are true to you, which is your belief about yourself, turns into your feelings, your emotions, your emotional reaction, and then that turns into physical reaction, or your actions, the things you actually do.

So, if you don’t take responsibility to what you're focusing on or what your thought process is. Then you're at the effect of wherever your mind wanders with whatever happens around you and, in that aspect, you're a victim. And it could turn out positive, like a victim doesn't have to be negative, you're a victim to your surroundings, and whoa, something good happened, okay? But you're still a victim of your surroundings, you had no responsibility of that. And when you talk about getting a free ticket or showing up for a free event, well, you don't connect as much value to that. And if you're not taking responsibility and you're at the effect of everything, well, you're not connecting as much value internally on yourself, like how much value you feel you have of you. And that's where that begins, man, like, you know what you focus on. If you focus on the fact or I hate to say the fact you focus on all the time that you are not worthy and you're not good enough and you're never gonna amount to anything, well, that's gonna create an emotional reaction. So, if you keep repeating that mantra internally, that's gonna have an emotional reaction, which is then gonna turn into physical actions, which then turns into your reality. And you just gotta pay attention and take responsibility for those things that you can control.

Michael: I wanna go deeper into this ‘cuz this is like, I watch the transformation of my life and the people I coach and thousands of people around the world, just even as just being an observer of humanity and I see that all the time. And so I'm wondering, how did that play out for you? Where were the things that you recognized? What were the actions that you took and what was the outcome for you? I wanna look at it from both perspectives. Everybody always leans into the positive sh*t. I'm like, yeah, that's not necessarily helpful. I want to create some context around where you were when you started to notice and you started to make those changes and what that looked like?

Dr. G: Well, it was in my early twenties, you know, I had a young family and we had a lot of things that we didn't have control over. So, that was the beginning of trying to take responsibility or take control of the things I could control, which is something happens that is unexpected, that was out of your control. The only thing you have control is labeling as something, was it good? Was it bad? Is it a positive thing? Is it a negative thing? And there's a really great story and you might not have heard it, or you might have, I don't know. I'll summarize it for you.

But there was a farmer and a son. The farmer and his son had a horse. The horse ran away. The whole village comes down and says, oh, that's terrible, your horse ran away and the farmer says, maybe. And then the next day the horse comes back and it brings a wild horse with it. And the whole town comes down and goes, that's fantastic. And the farmer goes, maybe. Then the next day, the sun is breaking in that horse and the horse bucks him off and he breaks his ankle and the whole town says, oh, that's terrible and the farmer says, maybe. And then the next day the army comes by to recruit a son and draft him and they pass over him because he is got a broken ankle and the whole town says, oh, that's amazing. Congratulations. He says, maybe. And the point with that is that we project the positive or negative in each thing that occurs. The events are just events. You're the one that puts the emotion and the positive or negative or whatever into that event or into that thing. So, if you just take the neutral approach, and I don't mean never get excited and I don't mean never get sad or whatever. My point is that if you take things for what they are, you really can't predict the future, you don't know. You go well in the moment. Yeah. Okay, cool. Yeah, that's great. We got an extra horse. We'll see where it leads, you know, and that's that responsibility side. You know, you don't go crazy with your emotions.

A friend of mine, Brandon Dawson, he talks about, which you're very familiar with, obviously, but he talks about high emotion, low intelligence, which makes sense. If you're extremely angry and extremely upset, you're not going to talk or act with very much intelligence. Same thing if you're extremely excited, you're extremely euphoric, you're not gonna think or act with very much intelligence, and that's fine to be like that, but you don't wanna live in either one of those states.

Michael: Yeah. And that's a really valid point, and yeah, I love Brandon. I think sometimes I sit and I talk with him and I go, I need to get away from you because I cannot comprehend whatever the h***l coming outta your brain right now. He's arguably one of the most intelligent people, he's gotta be a genius. I want him to do release a IQ score sometime just out of curiosity.

Dr. G: He's definitely a business scaling genius for sure, that is a true statement.

Michael: Yeah, for sure. And so, I think that you're spot on because the greatest mistakes I've made in my life, well, twofold. One, they probably involved alcohol when I was younger, ‘cuz obviously in most idiots who get drunk do idiot things And I was an idiot when I was in my twenties or well teens and twenties ‘cuz I started drinking pretty young. And the other part of it, those huge, huge mistakes I made was this massive emotional dump, it was like, here I am, high, high, low, low and then I learned how to control my emotions. And people don't understand that controlling your emotions isn't about not letting them exist or be present ‘cuz dude, I laugh, I cry, I feel the full range like, it's just who I am now. And it's about when they come up, I just question them, I go, what is this actually about? What is really happening?

Dr. G: Yeah. It's being present with those emotions. It's not suppressing them; it's not saying I'm gonna wrestle with them. It just says, look, this emotion is coming up for a reason. Let's use it to my advantage instead of it using me. That's the thing that takes repetition and growth and learning, you have to learn how to do that. And so, it's so funny how we are as adults ‘cuz kids, you know, they try something, they fall off, and riding a bike is a great example. They get up and they ride and they fall and they cry and then they get back on it and they don't think twice about it. It's like, no, no big deal. I'm just gonna keep doing it until I can ride the darn bike. I don't know if the world or as we age, or maybe there's some sort of as you mature process that your brain starts twisting things that I don't know about, whatever. But the point is, is that as we age, for whatever reason, we start to view ourselves as certain things like, oh, I'm a failure, because like, no, if you view it as I tried, it didn't work, and I'm going to learn from that experience and try again. You know, that's something that we all should do, and we're so afraid of how other people will label this, oh, you started a business and it didn't work out. You're a failure. And like, well, actually no. I learned a lot about that business and I'm gonna start another one. I mean, statistically, there's a 90% failure rate after 10 years. So, if you start nine businesses, you know, statistically nine of those are gonna feel. But if you start 10, that last one, it doesn't mean you're gonna feel nine in a row. It just means that, if you start 10 businesses, one of them are gonna massively hit. And I'm not saying that you're going to fail nine times but the point is that if you have that mentality of like, I'm gonna keep doing this because it is coming out of me, it's part of who I am until I figure out a way to make it happen, you'd be surprised at the resources you come up with and figure out, it's the doubt that gets in the way of the fear. What happens if, oh man, ‘cuz you can’t see all the things that are happening out in the universe and control all of them. You don't know what's coming at you. I mean, look, we've been talking about getting on the podcast and getting you and I, getting something scheduled. And we've tried to hit with different things where our schedules are really busy. And out of the blue I connect with you and you're like, Hey man, I had a thing pop up, you wanna hop on? Can we make this happen? You know, like there's a reason that happened. I don't know why.

Michael: Yeah. It was the right time. And I have a lot of thoughts about these kinds of things and you know, one of them that feels really true for me is like, as a kid you haven't yet been indoctrinated, right? You haven't been told stand on the right side of the hall, raise your hand to go to the bathroom lunches at 11:12 till 11:17, you haven't dealt with that sh*t yet. And you haven't dealt with parents who don't believe in themselves ‘cuz their parents didn't believe in them and the generational trauma, like hasn't started to seep in yet. Like this is a weird way to phrase it, but in some aspect, like as a kid, you're nihilistic because you have no concern about anything. Right. You're probably not nihilistic know, like with knowledge of it. Right. But there's like this element to it. And you talked about surrender and letting go like, that's the only way you're gonna be successful. Man, I fail so many businesses in my life, it's not even funny. Dude, so many, and I mean when I talk about failed, I mean like failed like now I'm 50 grand and the hole failed, like huge mistakes and all I've ever done from that is learn. And what I realized probably, I don't know, it was probably six or seven years ago, man, I was just like, it doesn't matter. Like Greg, if you really button this up right, if you really look at the scope of life, it doesn't actually matter, like none of this stuff at the end of the day like, show up, be a good person, love your family, try your hardest that stuff that matters ‘cuz that makes you feel good about who you are as a human being. But at the end of the day, bro, name your great, great, great grandpa. Right.

Dr. G: Exactly. Yeah. Alex Hormozi talks about that. He talks about three generations ago, his great-great-great grandpa was actually like a, some sort of king of some sort of country somewhere before his family ended up immigrating to America last in the most recent generation. This guy had something like, you know, and I don't wanna misquote it, but he talks about the guy had, he was a king and he had like 20 wives and had like 400 kids or something, and so he is supposed to be this guy that had everything and all this wealth and all this power and whatever and you got two generations later, it's like your own great-great grandsons. Like, I don't even know the guy who is, you know, whatever. We take things so seriously, like we blow 'em up into big things and you're like, honestly, for the most part, most things really aren't, you know, big things.

Michael: Yeah. You know what I love? And I'm glad you just said that because, and I've mentioned this on the show before, I heard Alex talk about that, and he was the first person that, other than me, I'd ever heard articulate that because I used to have, dude, I used to literally have friends be like, that's so dumb. I can't believe that you think that way and I'm like, yeah, but you don't get it, man. Like all of those things, do they impact you? Yeah, of course man, life will f*** get you, but at the end of the day, it's like the bad things, like they've already happened. Why are you trapped in it? Why are you stuck in it?

Dr. G: I love what you just said. Why are you trapped in it? Michael, a singer, wrote a book called, the Untethered Soul. Have you ever read that book? And also, The Surrender Experiment was another one, it was his follow up boo. But he talks about, you know, holding onto emotion. And one of the stories he has, which is one of my favorites, he talks about, you know, people driving a car and most people like to go five miles an hour over the speed limit. So, what if you're driving your car, you're going five miles an hour over the speed limit, and somebody pulls out in front of you and going five miles an hour under the speed limit. You know, for the most of the part, like most people would have road rage, they'd get mad, they'd get pissed off, they'd get frustrated at the person in front of them. Well, there's two points here. Number one, what gives you the right to say that your way of driving is the right way of driving? Like he's going five miles an hour under, you're going five miles an hour over neither one of them are the speed limit. Like why are you the correct way? So, how egotistical to think, well, my way is the way? And then secondly, does you getting mad in your vehicle affect the guy in front of you in that vehicle? For the most part, it doesn't. It only affects the people in your surroundings, the people that are in your vehicle. Now, some people hold onto that all day and it affects their entire day, all the people around them, they'll talk about it. You wouldn't believe what happened this morning. This guy pulled out in front of me and he was doing five miles an hour. Where we could be putting our energy and effort into something way more productive and constructive. But why would you sit in that? And that's what I'm talking about with taking responsibility. So, before you have a conversation or before you jump into something or before you have thoughts and start spewing things out, you know, just think about, is this helping me toward the vision of my future that I want or not? And if it's not, it's like, well then why are you doing it?

Michael: Yeah, dude, that's such an interesting point ‘cuz you and I like in this conversation could be pissed off at each other for having to reschedule on each other. Right. And here was my thought with it has just been like, you had to do it. I had to do it. It's f**ng life. It's fine. We will figure it out when it is time to figure it out. But like people tie into that, they get stuck in it. People are like still pissed off about their family from 25 years ago and it's like, look, let's be clear Greg, ‘cuz I don't want to discount any of this. You're allowed to be. I will never take that away from you. But how is it helping you, man? Let's talk about this for a second. How the f**k is it helping you to be man? Like my mother cut my finger off when I'm four years old. I allowed that to destroy me for 26 years, it never helped me. And then I turned it into a point of power.

Dr. G: You turned it in. I love that you said that you turned it into a point of power. And it probably took a long time to wrestle with that and being hate, angry and upset and whatever. And you know, there's lots of people that are very successful that had started, and I don't mean successful just financially, I mean successful in life. What I mean is they're content and they're happy and they're fulfilled and they're helping others and they're doing the things they want to do, that's what I mean by success. A lot of people, when they hear success, they think money and I'm like, no, that's not just that, sometimes it's that as well, but content and all that fulfilled. But a lot of people, you know, they live in that and they hold onto it and then they define themselves and they never get out of it, they never take the time to say, well, if I re-look at that situation, what does that mean now to me? And could I see it in a different way? And then when the emotions start to looking at those emotions and asking the emotion questions and all those things that have to occur in order to go, oh, okay, I have a different understanding of different perspective. And so many people get so mad and frustrated and angry and upset, and all these negative emotions about things that aren't even real because they're making it up in their head about what the person, like, for instance, a really simple example that you just brought up. You know, if you had to reschedule on me, I had to reschedule on you. What if I said, well, man, he probably doesn't, what if he doesn't like me? He probably doesn't like me, that's why he had to reschedule it because I'm not good enough. Oh, I don't have the information he wants, and da, da, da, da, da, on and on, and on and on, and none of that is helpful, number one. And secondly, most of the time it's not even true, it's just like, man, I just had a schedule conflict like, it's just what it is. So, you know, what I tell people a lot is what I work with. I work with 'em one-on-one and especially in a group setting masterminds that we have and I just like, let's talk about these things and actually look at 'em and analyze them in a neutral setting. Instead of putting all the emotion in and just saying, what does it mean now? Is there a different way to look at it? And start asking questions and then you start to have different connections in your brain and then you go, oh, okay. Now I have a different appreciation for it. And that's really what I try to do, is I try to be grateful and appreciative of pretty much anything and everything in life that we take for granted on a day-to-day basis. And so, if you can do those things, man, life just becomes a lot more fulfilling and you take all that negative drama, emotional, because that's where most people go, they end up in the negative, that's what our news does, that's what society does, it's all nagging and complaining and draining and negative and that's kind of where we tend to go as human beings ‘cuz we're always trying to survive and we're looking at all for all the things that are trying to kill us. Well, for the most majority of people, there's not things roaming around trying to kill us right now we're doing this stuff to ourselves. So, you can get out of that and get, develop a different habit, which is the habit of appreciation, gratitude, the habit of thinking before you actually talk, or a take action or the habit of analyzing things and saying maybe there's a different way of looking at that. You know, if somebody snaps at you, you could say, well, they're just a jerk. Or maybe there's something that they're dealing with, maybe talk to 'em, maybe ask 'em a question. Have you ever heard of the story of about the guy on the subway with the three kids? You ever hear that story?

Michael: I don't think so. No.

Dr. G: Let me tell a story ‘cuz it's a very good one.

There's a guy on the subway, it's in New York. It's very busy. He's got three kids. The kids are jumping around all over the place and there's a guy observing and he's standing there and the dad's just sitting there not doing anything and the kids are being rambunctious and all over the place and after about five or 10 minutes, the guy that's standing up has had enough. He's watched these kids do all sorts of stuff to people and annoy everyone around them. And he goes, hey, and the guy looks up and he goes, aren't you gonna do something about your kids? And the guy sitting there goes, yeah, I should, I'm sorry. We just got back from their mom's funeral and they don't know how I handle it and I'm kind of at a loss, I don't know where I'm gonna go. And all of a sudden, the anger that this guy had towards the guy sitting there turned into, you know, sympathy, it turned into like, oh, I appreciate the situation. I'm sad for your situation. And all of a sudden, these annoying kids are like, Hey, let me help you with them, you know, and sometimes all, you just gotta talk to the person, you just gotta ask them, Hey man, can I help you? Is there anything I can do for you? Serve. Give. Have gratefulness. Have a little compassion. You know, if you can develop those, the habit of having those majority of the time that your life becomes that. Your life is the emotions you live on a moment to moment, day to day basis.

Michael: Well, I can just listen because in this, my brain is just going through all these things and the thing that's I'm sitting with right now is just going, we are lied to in this country. I'm speaking as an American, I believe this is the greatest country on planet earth f*** period. That's me being very biased. I know we have international listeners, but I'm I'll get into this and I'll tell you why. Because this is a country where a kid like me who had to steal food to survive and was homeless at eight years old, can have a life where I gotta speak on the biggest stages in the world. And so, for me, like a kid in India, that's almost impossible and it's devastating and it breaks my heart. And we're told here, this is what I mean by we're lied to. We're told your friends are dangerous. Be careful. Stay away from that neighbor, that guy over there is weird. The media's out to get you. Everything's bad all the time, everywhere. And we are living in a fear state, whether it be COVID or we run outta eggs or the gas crisis or you know, three people died and there's a billion people in this country. And it's like, guys, hold on perspective. Please. For the love of God, take a timeout and look at the world that you live in. It's the safest time to ever be alive. There's more information and education in history. Life expectancy is bigger than, it's longer than it's ever been. Are there problems? Yep. For sure, a hundred percent. Is there conflict? Is there death? Is there genocide and rape and slaughter and all the bad things? Yeah, for sure, a hundred percent. Let's not pretend that doesn't exist. But there's things you can do to give and change and create, and that's a big reason why Think Unbroken, we donate to Operation Underground Railroad every month because we wanna rescue children from child sex trafficking. And it's like, don't be a complainer, be a doer, that guy on the train, they're not following the status quo. Right. But why? Well, their mom just f*** died. And for a lot of people, what you have to do is we have to take a step back, and that's why I love this. I'm gonna say it again I love this RIP acronym that you've come up with because it's so true. 99% of the time, Greg, when I get pissed off which happens quite frequently, happens probably 10 times, happens probably 10 times a day, right? Seriously, probably happens 10 to 25 times a day, somewhere in that range. Immediately I ask myself, why am I mad? And just as immediately as I'm pissed off, I'm back to neutral because I get clarity about what's going on. You can be mad about everything you're allowed to be. I'm not taking it away from you, but you have to ask yourself a very, very, very serious question. Does it serve you? And chances are it doesn't. My friend, this has been an absolutely incredible conversation. I think we need to have more time; we'll have to get into this a little bit deeper. But for the sake of that, tell us please where everyone can find your new book and learn more about you?

Dr. G: Yeah, I mean the new book is Fix Your BS and it's all over the place, man. You can find it anywhere, you know, Google Fix Your BS. I'm Dr. Greg Pursley. You can go to, Fix Your BS on any social media, or you can go to fixyourbs.com. Dr. Greg Pursley, I also have my personal account, you can go there too. So, Dr. Greg Pursley, man, either one. But I'm here to serve and we put the book on online at this as the cheapest we possibly could, just so we can get the message out there so we can spread it. I think it's 99 cents on Kindle. We have Fixture BS Podcast, which you're gonna be on not too long. So, man, I'm hoping to serve, I'm hoping to give, I'm hoping I can spread some understanding of the way life works and so people can compress time and live the emotions they actually want to live as opposed to being in a state that they're not happy with.

Michael: Yeah, I love that. And of course, we'll put all of those links in the show notes. If you go to thinkunbrokenpodcast.com, look up Dr. G ‘cuz that's what we're gonna put this episode under and go to thinkunbrokenpodcast.com. You'll be able to grab a copy of the book. My last question for you, my friend, what does it mean to you to be unbroken?

Dr. G: Well, I mean to be unbroken is a constant evolution of your life. The things that you think are correct now are probably gonna be incorrect in the future. You're gonna look back and go, I probably could have done that better or different. And so in that aspect or that instance, you're breaking something, or you a broken person. So, we should constantly strive to become a better version of ourselves, which is what that unbroken really is. It's saying, man, I'm trying to put these pieces together of my life and of who I am to where I learn more about who I am and what I like and what I love about life and what I want to develop in life and where I want to go and if I can do all those things, eventually I'll get to less and less of brokenness, which is really what Unbroken is.

Michael: Yeah, I love that, dude. Thank you so much for being here, my friend. Unbroken Nation. Thank you for listening.

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Michael Unbroken

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Michael is an entrepreneur, best-selling author, speaker, coach, and advocate for adult survivors of childhood trauma.

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Greg Pursley aka Dr. G

Speaker, Author, CEO, Husband, Father, Singer, Guitarist

DR. GREG PURSLEY
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Dr Greg Pursley aka Dr G is a catalyst for personal growth. He is on a mission
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