E261: Being obsessed with healing | Trauma Healing Coach

Have you ever had somebody tell you that you are obsessed?

What's up, Unbroken Nation! Hope that you're doing well wherever you are in the world today. So over the weekend I was a little bit under the weather you'll probably notice some a it stuff still getting through it but that's a part of a human experience, right? Sometimes we're gonna get sick and someone had messaged me on social and they're like, hey! Man, even when your sick like, you don't take time off, you don't rest, you don't recover. I'm like well, I do actually I spent my whole weekend which is very uncommon spent my entire weekend on the couch and bed like working and like doing stuff. Because to me I'm like alright, if I'm gonna be sick what else am I gonna do? I work online, I can build programs, I can work on editing in books and so I was like alright, cool and this person said they're like you're obsessed and and I thought to myself you know what I am.

I am obsessed with healing and I think that if you want to be able to create massive change in your life you have to be obsessed, not obsessive in a way that like destroys friendships and families and relationships that's borderline dangerous. But more also so obsessed about like the continuing of like just showing up for yourself every day and and of course I rest, I take time off, if I need it.

One of the best things about being an entrepreneur and what I do with Think Unbroken is if it's a Tuesday at noon I can like take a nap like you what I mean, I'm not stuck an office. So on the times here's what I think about, on the times when it makes the most sense for me to take care of myself I do and I hope that you do as well. And what I want you to think about is in the times in which you are in this journey and you're like deep in it are there people around you telling you that you're obsessed? Like you go to therapy too much, you read too many books, you're too deep in personal development, you listen to this podcast too often, right? Because if those people in your life you might wanna sit down and talk with them and tell them how important it is that you and them are an alignment with the direction that you're going because there's nothing wrong with being obsessed in the right way.

Some people get obsessed with video games and with porn and with cars and with spending money on stuff they can't afford and I think that a lot of people who are over on this side are you know the Unbroken Nation especially you guys we're obsessed with getting healthy with ending generational trauma, with breaking this cycle and with ultimately getting this place in our life where we can stand up on our own two feet. And I don't think there's anything wrong with that and so I had a bit of back and forth with this person online and I basically just explained to them I was like look my goal is very simple. I want to end generational trauma in my lifetime through education and information. Period. And so that means on the days where I'm not feeling great, you know, I'm probably still gonna work for ninety minutes, I'm probably still gonna do some things. Now I will say this on Sunday, I was out like there was nothing like I can't tell you how much I did not do on Sunday like my face was melting off so you gotta take care of yourself. And that was one of those moments where I looked and I said alright, what do I actually need right now? What I need in this moment and what I needed was to make sure that I put my physical body in my well being first. But other than that like I think about this idea about it being obsessed and it's like why do people point out that you're obsessed with your life? Should it you be? Shouldn't you be obsessed with the things that bring you joy and happiness and fulfillment and make you wanna show up and make you wanna push harder and make you want to ultimately be the person that you know your capable of being? Like why is that a bad thing and I don't think it is and I think unfortunately and tell people around us start to recognize and accept that it's always this uphill battle.

I’ve been called a probably like five hundred million times but it's just not true, I'm not because I'm not going to sacrifice my livelihood, my friendships. I'm gonna do my best not to sacrifice the people in my life because of the career, because of coaching, because of Unbroken Nation, right? And I think that one of the most important aspects of this for me is those hard boundaries, right? And looking at and going where do I need to have time? Where do I need to commit myself? Where do I need to show up? And it's not that I'm flawless and because I assure you I'm certainly fucking not. But what I want you to think about is where do you need to commit more in your life to this journey? What could you be doing to learn more? What could you get obsessed with that's going to help propel you forward? And a lot of times when you get deep into this means you're learning, you're going through coaching, you're going through personal development books, you're going through seminars and in those things what is happening you're expediting speed in which you are taking in all this information because the best part about the especially like you listen to the show you don't have to go through the things that I or the guests go through in the same pace because we've already lived our help and my hope especially is we give you the ability to shortcut so much of this, because like I wanna call it like tyranny of suffering through healing because I don't have a better way to phrase it where you're just like alright hold on, I keep doing this shit, people are tell me to do these things, it's not working and I'm like who are you learning from. You know I talked about these couple weeks ago just like looking at who you're learning from who you're taking in information from being very diligent about making sure they're the right fit for you. But once you find that right fit being obsessed like I'll give you a perfect example… so you guys all know Tom Bilyeu has been a coach in mine for years, almost every single day someone emails me like, hey, man I want you in my program come and get coach, join this mastermind. And a lot of this is from people that I love and I'm not gonna do it because I'm obsessed with learning from this person, right?

When I start reading personal development books, right now I'm reading about money because I believe and you've heard me mentioned this before that we are going through this phase of money trauma not only in real time but for many trauma survivors like that's this catalyst for all the chaos of our lives. And so I sat down one day I was like alright what do I need to do to learn about money? And so I just started getting all these books about money right now I'm reading the psychology of money, read the Tony Robins book on money, of Grant Cardone book on money, Kawasaki book on money and it's just like what I need to do, is under it's not about getting like filthy rich and getting stocks and all this shit but it's like I don't understand money at this scale in which I should because nobody taught me about it, right? So I'm obsessed with learning about it. Do I wanna be rich? Of course I do because I wanna be able to impact the world and this really beautiful way, you can't do that without a lot of money. And so that said when I think about the things that we get obsessed with how do you get obsessed with things that bring value to your life?

How do you get obsessed with things that make your life better?

How do you get obsessed with doing what you need to do every single day to live your life on your terms?

And for the people that are naysayers I'm like oh, you think about that too much, you talk about that too much, you're in that too much. I'm gonna tell you right now you're probably around the wrong people and I know that's a hard thing to hear but the truth is anyone telling you that you're obsessed about creating your life is someone who they need to spend some time getting obsessed about creating their damn life, you know what I mean? And I think that's one of the most important things of this journey is recognizing and looking at people around you or not an alignment.

Just today I was on Instagram and somebody stole my identity. So I guess is not really selling my identity but they mimic the Michaelunbroken page and I don't know seventy-five people DM me and like, hey, this person has been messaging us they're not you and I was thinking to myself oh that's interesting. So instead of being obsessed with their own life they're obsessed with mine. And that to me maybe me it made me pause for a moment ago does that mean like I'm actually doing something that matters at this point or they just being fraudulent? I don't know what that really means.

And so in that the thing that I've come to think about with that particular experience is just thinking man, imagine if they would to put that energy just think about this for second… Imagine if they would put that energy into their own life. Imagine if you put that energy into your own life instead of being obsessed with things that don't matter, that don't bring you value, that's never going to impact you for the better, that doesn't make anything about your life different. You know it's the Netflix and again I'm not shitting on Netflix like watch TV, who cares? But like how much are you doing that? How often are you going to the club? How often are you going to brunch with friends? How often are you not like deep into this work learning, growing, changing, healing. And so I'm obsessed with it like look you don't get to the point that I am in life without really putting in like thirty thousand hours, right? I'm getting ready to do another trauma conference in May what are we six weeks away from that, right? And it's like just learning, learning, learning, learning, more certifications, more education, more growth because as this trauma field like continues to expand I realized that one of the really interesting things about it is like I've gotta be even more obsessed about learning about it because it's moving so quickly. And to be honest with you I think a lot of the old ideas and I started learning six and seven years ago while they have foundation like it's kind of like it's old hat like it's not the thing so how do we get into what's next?

And so I'm obsessed with that and I think about this if I weren't obsessed with that how could I be of service to you? How could I be of service to the Unbroken Nation if I'm not obsessed? We've giving you things that I need first, right? It's that this is why coaches have coaches, have coaches because you get a learn from me because I'm learning from them. And I think that's the biggest key about all this like just showing up every single day being very pointed about what you want and going for it. Read all the books, right? Go to all the seminars, listen to all the podcasts, fill your brain with information about this subject matter, there are some episodes of this show that come to mind where I'm like go and listen to the conversation with Dave Hollis or Ana Lembke or John Lee Dumas or Jordan Harbinger or I mean the list goes on and on these people with this incredible wealth of knowledge to give to us that we gotta learn from, be obsessed with that, listen those up.

I've listened to my own episode with Tom Bilyeu like ten times because I'm always picking stuff up. I've read books, I've read body keeps a score probably seven times in the last three years, right? Keep learning, keep being obsessed, you're never gonna do anything one time and understand it so those people in your life were like oh, you're obsessed, you care about this too much. Good, you should be. Because if you're not, who's going to?

So that said my friends, I hope that you'll find something in your life to be obsessed about that makes it better, that's not taking away, that's not disrupting your community but instead is bringing value to yourself and the people in your life.

That said my friends thank you so much for being here.

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And Until Next Time.

My friends, Be Unbroken.

I'll see you!