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Feb. 13, 2022

E209: Why You Need to Stop Personal Development | Trauma Healing Coach

E209: Why You Need to Stop Personal Development | Trauma Healing Coach

In this episode, I talk about why you need to stop personal development. When's the last time you did less? When's the last time you didn't do all the things all the time? Taking a break from personal development and healing is not going to slow you...
See show notes at: https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/e209-why-you-need-to-stop-personal-development-trauma-healing-coach/#show-notes


In this episode, I talk about why you need to stop personal development.

When's the last time you did less?

When's the last time you didn't do all the things all the time?

Taking a break from personal development and healing is not going to slow you down because you can't like this isn't a heal; you're not going to reverse down the fucking heal because you didn't meditate today.

It's about honoring your truth because your truth isn't going to lie to you. Your truth isn't going to lie to you today.

Just get focused, listen, and be ready to learn, and I'm going to do my best to bring massive value to your life and your trauma healing journey.

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Transcript

When's the last time you did less?

When's the last time you didn't do all the things all the time?

---

What's up, Unbroken Nation! I hope that you're doing well. Very excited to be back with you with another episode. And as I’m still walking in the living room. Guys, we're almost there. I'm coming through, home stretch coming through, and I'm going to tell you this. For the better part of a week I've done nothing but a little bit here and there, but my little bit here and there feels like nothing in comparison to what my weeks are normally like. And the reason why I've done nothing, it's because I had to listen to my body.

See, you need to listen to yourself.

What do you need?

What is telling yourself?

One of the things that I love in pop culture, is this moment where Kanye goes, I love myself like I love Kanye and I was like, I love that, I get it. Like, you should love yourself for yourself. You should love, you should listen, you should do the thing that you need to do for you. I know you listen to show you look for advice you go. Okay, cool, write goals, you can journal. I'm gonna take the ThinkUnbroken app and download that on the iTunes store. I'm gonna read the books. I'm going to listen to podcasts, you want to show up every day and go to the gym, going to do all these things.

I can tell you with certainty that doing all those things will absolutely make your life different and an absolute certainty I can additionally tell you that sometimes the best thing you can do is none of that shit. Don't do any of it. Don't do any of it. We got so encumbered by all the things all the time and I know if you listen to my show and you reading my books, you're listening other shows, reading other books, you know, so much information coming to you.

I'm tell you right now, my morning routine when I get through this, we'll go back to what it was, very likely, or it may not, it might shift, I might take something out, might add something. I might not even have a morning routine anymore that's very unlikely, but I'm just saying it's possible.

And if you're in this position in your life, where you just doing all the things all the time ad nauseam, and you're like, man, what the fuck is become so routine and habitual that is not actually benefiting you anymore. I want you to ask yourself, why are you doing it? If it's not benefiting you, why are you doing it? If it's not making your life better, why are you doing it?

 Clarity.

Unbroken Nation Clarity, I tell you all the time.

You must have it.

You must have it in what you're doing all the time in your life.

And for me, because I want to give you context here. Having surgery doctor goes, dude, you need to chill, you need to rest, you need to not do anything for a while. Me not doing anything is like torture, it is because I'm like shit. Every day I'm not doing something I'm not moving towards my goals. And as I was sitting on the couch, icing, being in tremendous pain. I started watching billions and this is a show I've been wanting to watch for a long time, and I've seen a couple of episodes, but I was like, you know what? I could really literally can't do anything but sit on the couch for the next week, so a module watch billions and read some books. But as I'm sitting there watching it, I was thinking to myself, wow, this is actually the first time I've entirely honored what my body has told me to do and not try to push it.

Now, maybe that's the physical restraint of the injury and the surgery; sure, I acknowledge that. But I also think that maybe what it is and more importantly, what it is; is coming to the realization that I'm getting better listening to myself, honoring my needs and showing up for myself.

So that's what prompts this question today. Are the things that you're doing is this routine that you're in, making your life better, different, impacting you, bringing value?

For me, what I notice is that I need my routine even as I'm like sitting here having this conversation with you having not gone through the routine, having not worked out, having only journal a couple of times and read some books but not push myself in the way that I normally do on a day-to-day basis. I feel off. I feel a little bit off. And that's such a great sensation to have because it tells me that the things that I've been doing are to my benefit. It tells me when I wake up at Monday, at 5:45 in the morning and I drink my coffee and I have my water and then I stretch and then I grab my journal and then I write in my journal, then I write my goals and then I do personal development, then I go to the gym, then I come home and shower, then I write and then I start working.

It tells me that because that routine is so effective for me, but I actually needed in my life, right? I didn't include meditation with medications in there as well.

And I think about this.

Taking a break from personal development and healing is not going to slow you down because you can't like this isn't a heal, you're not going to reverse down the fucking heal because you didn't meditate today. I know there's people out here. I've meditated every single day for 74 years. Great. Congratulations! I'm not that guy, I can promise you right now. I have not meditated every day this year, not even close. Do I do it the majority of the time? Absolutely every day no what's on my body. Listen to your body, listen to your heart and what that tells you. You might need a break. You might need to stop listing those podcasts right now.

So, I was coaching one of my clients before the holidays and he was telling me he was like, dude, I got like personal development fatigue and I laughed I said, yeah, no shit, motherfucker, you're doing more shit than I'm doing trying to heal. He's like, man, I just want it to be over, I just want to go through it, I want to learn all the things and I sat there with them, I've been coaching him for a while now. He's amazing human being. I love watching Grove, and I'm sitting there with him and he says this to me and I go dude, I already told you this is a lifetime mission.

Whatever you're doing today, you're going to still have to keep doing so find the stuff that works for you, keep doing those things. He was like, dude. You're right, I'm so exhausted. And I said, I know you're exhausted, I can tell your personal development exhausted, that's not a real, that’s not a term that's been coined, but I'm cleaning it so I had to move a chair then my way, I'm doing my walking in the living room guy. So this happened in real time.

So I'm telling them, I'm like, dude. Listen, you gotta take a break, here's what you need to do, until our next session one week from now. No, personal development. No books. No podcast. No journaling. No meditating. Nothing. You're exhausted. You have personal development, exhaustion and fatigue. You have worn yourself out. Go into groups and seminars and listen to my ass talk to you all day and do the Think Unbroken curriculum in the 6-week coaching program with the Think Unbroken app that's over there on iTunes, doing the whole thing.

I'm like, bro, hold on. Stop. Listen to yourself. This is about honoring, your truth. I want you to understand this. This is about honoring your truth. Your body sitting here telling you, dude, I'm fucking tired. I don't want to go do personal development today, I can't because I'm so tired, but my brain cannot consume another person tell me how to change my life. I can't go to yoga class again today, my body is so tired and so worn out because I went to yoga 64 days in a row. I actually did that, I actually did sixty-four days in a row. I'm so exhausted emotionally because I go cry at my therapist's office three times a week, I can't even connect with anybody, I become a robot.

Listen to yourself this shit so, good, I promise you, this podcast is gonna be here tomorrow and then going nowhere. The books are going to be there tomorrow a week from now. I'm not saying, like cold turkey, stop doing everything forever but I am saying give it a fucking break, it's okay. You're probably being less productive by being consumed with this content all day long than you would be if you just move forward and create action in your life.

So I just want you to think about that.

Do you need a break from personal development for a minute? Because I'll tell you this on the backside of it now, it's been a week for me outside of a couple meditations and a couple journals. I haven't done anything, nothing except watch television, which is very uncomfortable, but I don't have a choice.

So, again, there's factors, but I remember if I rewind just a bit, go back to December. I took almost the entire month off, almost the entire month of December off because I needed a break. I said, man, I've coached non-stop for over four years of written multiple books, I've traveled the world non-stop a bit on planes, I was on a plane like 35 times last year, seriously, like did not stop all the conference's, coaching, being coached, I was like, you know what? It's time for a real break. I listen to myself. I honored that.

So, one of the best things I've done in my entire adult life is learn how to honor myself.

So ask yourself;

Do I need this today?

Not do I need to not do it because I'm feeling lazy and procrastinating.

If that's how you approach this, you're in trouble, don't do that shit because actually don't fucking work, right? But if you're like feeling it, you're fatigued, you're like done.

Take a break. It's okay.

But if you're trying to just put it off because you don't want to do it, you fucking do it anyway, because that's the difference between success and failure. It's about honoring your truth because your truth isn't going to lie to you. Your truth isn't going to lie to you today. Your truth isn't going to lie to you tonight when you're like man fuck, I knew I should have read that book today, I knew I should have journal, you're getting ready to go get in your cozy ass bed, you need to get out of bed. Go get that book. Go get that journal. Do the things that you were going to do on it. Do the thing you said you were going to do.

So with that, my friends.

What do you need to do today?

Who do you need to be today?

How do you need to show up in your life today that's honoring your truth, your reality what you need?

Unbroken Nation, thank you so much for listening.

I appreciate it and thank you for handling this audio quality with me.

I know it's not as good as the other show, but I still cannot sit down vertically yet so I can't stand for too long either.

So I got to be in constant motion and so give me a few more days.

I'll be back on the mic; will be back to normal. I'm super excited about it.

Thank you so much to everybody leaving reviews on iTunes.

We're trying to get the 200 reviews by the end of this month.

Do me a huge favor. Go to iTunes, or go to thinkunbrokenpodcast.com.

Hit that five stars. Leave a review.

Share this with somebody who needs this today because I promise you, somebody in your life, needs this for it, and email, send it by a text, shared on social media somebody in your life needs us help deliver that message.

And I appreciate you guys.

Thank you so much for listening means the world to me.

And Until Next Time.

My friends, Be Unbroken.

I'll see yah.

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Michael Unbroken

Coach

Michael is an entrepreneur, best-selling author, speaker, coach, and advocate for adult survivors of childhood trauma.