Jan. 11, 2022

E176: Be Solution Oriented | CPTSD and Trauma Healing Coach

E176: Be Solution Oriented | CPTSD and Trauma Healing Coach

In this episode, I'm coming to you from Burbank, California just in L.A. here today, as I've just finished recording as a guest on the Mental Illness Happy Hour, and today, I share with you on how to be a solution-oriented. Remember, there will always...
See show notes at: https://www.thinkunbrokenpodcast.com/e176-be-solution-oriented-cptsd-and-trauma-healing-coach/#show-notes


In this episode, I'm coming to you from Burbank, California just in L.A. here today, as I've just finished recording as a guest on the Mental Illness Happy Hour, and today, I share with you on how to be a solution-oriented.

Remember, there will always be an obstacle, there will always be an objection, there's always going to be that thing in your way but if you are willing to adopt a mindset in which you are solution-oriented your dream become a reality.

What is your dream? What is the thing that you're moving towards right now?

When to Take Action — And When to Take a Step Back?

Keep Your Focus Forward and Listen Today!

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Transcript

Hey! What's up, Unbroken Nation! Hope that you're doing well, wherever you are in the world today. I am coming to you live well, I guess it's not live since I'm recording this and you're not listening to me record it in real time. I'm coming to you from Burbank, California just in L.A. here today, as I've just finished recording as a guest on the Mental Illness Happy Hour.

And I have to tell you this, I'm so unbelievably excited that I got the opportunity to do that because for the last seven years, I have had a goal of being a guest on that podcast and today it finally came to fruition. And I know you guys hear me talk about goals all the time, but first and foremost, I want to take a moment and just shout out Paul Gilmartin and the Mental Illness Happy Hour, because I don't think I've ever told you guys this, it's actually my favorite podcast in the mental health space. There's no question, it's a guest formatted show, it's not, Paul coaching, it's really kind of the opposite of Think Unbroken, but it's just incredible podcast that is all about people sharing their stories, sharing their pain and their suffering would also their victories and their successes and its really incredible.

And it has been such a pivotal podcast and really platform for me and my journey because when I first listened to the podcast and I want to say was probably like eight or nine years ago. It was something that felt very comfortable, I felt like home, it felt like being seen, it felt like being a part of something and I've continued to listen to it for years and years.

And a few years ago while about seven six or seven years ago, I wrote down a goal that one day I want to be on that podcast and I've listened to this podcast, Mental Illness Happy Hour in Thailand, and Vietnam, and London, and New York and L.A., everywhere I've ever been or traveled, it's always been like on my ear buds, right? And I said to myself, seven years ago, I want to be on that show, I want to tell my story, I want to show people that no matter what you come from that your life can be different. And the reason why particularly that show matter to me is because it is one that brought me so much compassion and joy and like – honestly, laughs in the process and Paul is first and foremost to comedian, but also just a really accommodating and kind person. I mean, I walked into record with him today and it just felt like I've known him forever and it was such an incredible and beautiful experience. You know the reality about all the things in life are this. If you can get very clear about what you want and where you want to go with your life, on a long enough time line, it can come to fruition.

You know, here's what's so, fascinating about me being a guest on this show. It's something that will forever change my life, I mean, maybe could it? Yeah, sure, I have no idea but more so it was about, I know what I want to do, I know what I want, I want this. And look, there's something to be said that your people can be and are the gatekeepers of some of the things in your life. Yes, of course, that's fair.

Somebody listen right now could go. Well, Paul might not have ruined you on the show, you'll never be on the show and there goes your goal, that's not how I identify myself with my goals and what I try to do in my life, I try to only create value for who I am by the effort and energy that I put in every single day.

This is the thing I've been telling you guys about a lot recently, is that you have to get crystal clear about your goals and then measure your self-worth, based on the energy that you put into them. And now that I've done this and I've accomplished, so I'm on the backside of reaching this goal, this huge thing of, I've wanted to do for almost a decade, and I'm sitting in the hotel room right now, getting ready to start working on the next mission, because you see, here's the reality, there's always going to be the next thing, there's always going to be tomorrow.

Now in the moment I celebrated and I got to give Paul a copy of the book with an inscription that I left and I got to hug him and say thank you for everything that you've done. And then I walked out the door and it was time for what's next? In the same way that we can get trapped in our defeats, we can also get trapped in our victories and so for me, the victory for this was the moment enjoy it, being present, showing up, having the opportunity and now that we're through that, it's time to start focusing on what's next, because I think you can differentiate little goals, big goals, gigantic goals, life-changing goals, all the things and how much time effort, energy, money, whatever you've spend in celebrating them. And so, for me, it was literally in that moment sitting with him after the show chatting, talking, connecting and in which I celebrated that victory.

Now that we're on the other side of it, what I'm thinking about is, what is next? What do I need to do for the Think Unbroken Nation audience? What do I need to do for my podcast? What do I need to do to continue to grow, to create value and to help the listeners, you guys, The Unbroken Nation, create massive, change in your life to ultimately become the hero of your own story, right? You see what I'm saying? If I got focused only in that and I didn't continue to move forward, what will happen on a long enough time line is that I'll find myself stuck. This is what used to happen to me all the time, I would be in a position in which I've actually accomplished something and I didn't know where to go from there.

One of the things that I always try to do in my life as have multiple goals and when I say that I'm generally around like five to seven goals, every single moment of my life that I'm trying to move towards and so now I get a check this off, move to the next one. One now look, I want to be clear because again, I think there's levels to goal like being on the podcast wasn't like the number one, most important goal of my life like I think that there's levels, but it was somewhere that it's been on the back of my mind for years and I write it down frequently, right? Because again, where attention goes, energy follows.

And now that I'm sitting here, I'm having this moment, I get a share this with you. One, of course, thank you for listening but nothing is impossible guys, nothing; no matter what you want, no matter where you've been, you can have the life that you want to have but you have to be willing to put in the effort and the energy. I can't tell you how many times Paul either, didn't respond to my emails or told me, no, or said not this year. You know what? I mean, and that's not nothing against him, I want to be very clear about that, right? There's always going to be a no in front of your, yes. There's always going to be a barrier in front of your bridge. There's always going to be something that's keeping you from going to where you can go in your life and the truth is, you have to be persistent, you have to put in massive action, you have to keep going forward all the time because eventually if you continue to do that, the thing that you're chasing will come and become your reality. It'll be here, you'll have this moment of going, well, I actually made this dream, this idea, this thing that I'm chasing become true. You have the ability to do that like everyone has the ability to do that but you have to be willing to go through the nose, go through the blocks, go through the barriers. I mean, it's the same thing as when I wrote Think Unbroken a few years ago. Nobody would give me the time of day and yet what I decided to do was not let other people dictate my dream.

And so what I want you to think about as you go into the day is what is your dream? What is the thing that you're moving towards right now? Where it feels like something there is an obstacle in your way and instead of looking at that obstacle as a defeat, what I want you to think about is how do you navigate that obstacle to continue to move forward towards what it is that you want in your life? Because there's always going to be an obstacle, there's always going to be an objection, there's always going to be that thing in your way and if you are willing to adapt a mindset in which you are solution-oriented, this is very important. When you become solution-oriented, you will always be looking for what it is that you can possibly do to make your dream become a reality.

And so solutions are about looking at exposing every possible opportunity to still continue to move forward because that roadblock in front of you before the bridge that doesn't make the bridge not there, you see what I'm saying? Like, just because there's something stopping you right now, doesn't mean that's the thing that has to stop you forever, I mean, it's the Thomas Edison analogy, right?

You know, the guy makes 999 light bulbs wrong and then he learns how to make it right one time. And that's truth, you have to continue to look for how you make your dream become a reality. And I know I've said that a couple times, but I really want you to sit with that. What do you have to do in your life today to make your dreams come true? Because there ain't no Disney moment, nobody's going to hand it to you and nobody's coming to save you. You're going to have to put in a tremendous amount of effort, you're going no way more than you get told yes, you're going to have people slam doors and delete the emails and not show up and not return the phone call and tell you you're not good enough, but you have to continue to look for solutions.

What I do when I find myself in a position, let's say I get in a position where I've totally got my back against the wall, I've tried everything I think I can try, there's no other way possible, I think that I can figure this out. I take a piece of paper and a pen, I write down what I'm trying to accomplish at the top and underneath it until the page is full. I write down every possible solution because I'm telling you this, you haven't done every thing yet. And when you understand that and you continue to try to build when you understand that you haven't done everything yet. You're going to be able to put yourself in a position in which you just start writing shit down and check off every single one of those boxes as you go because you will find that goal that you're trying to reach is very likely in one of those solutions?

All right, my friends, take this information with you.

Unbroken Nation, thank you so much for listening.

Please, like, subscribe, comment, share.

Tell a friend.

And Until Next Time.

My friends, Be Unbroken.

I'll see you.

 

 

Michael Unbroken

Coach

Michael is an entrepreneur, best-selling author, speaker, coach, and advocate for adult survivors of childhood trauma.