How to Not Give Up - From The Michael Anthony Was Here YouTube Channel.

Feeling like you want to give up and quit life is normal. You are not alone. You are not wrong. You are not broken. You are human. It's ok to feel like giving up, but you don't have to quit.
This is me, sitting down and keeping it real about the stuff we all go through. The pain, the struggle, the doubt, the relationships, and the fight to not give up on yourself.
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This channel is about helping you stop self-sabotaging, face the dark days head-on, and figure out how to actually build a life that feels worth living. I’ve been through the worst, I’ve built Think Unbroken, and I’ve spent years coaching people who felt lost, broken, or ready to quit. Now I’m taking everything I’ve learned and giving it to you here.
Here’s what we talk about:
How to not give up when life feels impossible
Breaking free from suicidal thoughts and dark patterns
Learning how to actually love yourself
Dating and relationships without all the games and bullshit
Crushing the limiting beliefs that keep you stuck
Building real confidence and self-worth
What it means to be human in the world we live in right now
If you’re struggling, you’re not alone. I’ve been there. This channel is proof that you don’t have to quit, and that you can come back stronger.
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[SPEAKER_00]: If you're watching this right now, you probably typed in, how do I not give up?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Give me a few minutes and I will help you a promise.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There will be something in here that will help you shift your perspective.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Hopefully we'll give you hope, but more importantly, let you know that you're not alone.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So, if you don't know me because this is the first video I'm posting on this channel, I'm Michael Anthony.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Some people might know me as Michael Unbroken, which is a handle that I created online, socially, and I'm the author of three books on award-winning podcast and of also coached thousands of people to help them overcome childhood trauma.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I decided to create this channel as a bit of a talking head channel, kind of a semi-journal to myself and kind of this thing where I just wanted to create content that's different than what I've put out over the course of almost ten years.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I have the Think of Broken Podcasts.
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[SPEAKER_00]: We've done almost a thousand episodes of that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Now the Think on Broken Books that we've sold tens of thousands of copies and I've had a countless number of people come through the Think on Broken Curriculum over the years and really transform their trauma to triumph.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so what I will tell you first and foremost is that I really just wanted to create this channel to help, to give you the thing that you are here seeking in guidance.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I can't change your life for you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Unfortunately, nobody can.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Only you can.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's one of those things that you are going to have to reconcile.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because if you do not, nothing in your life is going to be different.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And the truth is that most people's lives will never be different because they are unwilling to do the hard work.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But my guess is you're not most people.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So I want you to jam with me here for a little bit.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I promise you, you will walk away from this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And every conversation that we have here on this channel with something that will change you in a way.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And maybe that's just a seed being planted about possibility.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe there are steps in the process that I share that really unlock the next step for you, the next level for you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And maybe it's just being seen and know someone else feels where you're at.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I want to give you very quick context about who I am, so you understand why I'm talking about this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So if you're familiar with the A score, adverse childhood experiences, I have a score of ten, that's the highest that a score can be.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This means that I went through hell and back as a child.
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[SPEAKER_00]: My parents were drug addicts in alcoholics.
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[SPEAKER_00]: My mother actually cut off and disfigured my right index finger.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I was molested by a member of the church.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I spent a lot of my homeless, a lot of my childhood homeless because of my parents' financial decisions and their addictions.
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[SPEAKER_00]: By the time I was twelve, I was adopted.
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[SPEAKER_00]: My grandmother was super racist.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm by racial black and white.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that just totally threw me through chaos.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I spent most of my childhood getting high, getting drunk, stealing from people, robbing people.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I got kicked out of high school three times.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't even have a high school diploma.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And the reality is, well, let me
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[SPEAKER_00]: context.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I do, they gave it to me, they said, get out, let the streets handle you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I didn't earn it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'll put it that way.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then I chased money in career and I built something that was magical.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I became a award-winning destination wedding photographer in my twenties.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then I built all these other things.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then suddenly at thirty, I realized my life was a complete disaster.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I have my first rock bottom at twenty five but nothing changed and it wasn't until I learned what I'm about to talk to you about today that the shift really started to transpire and so through my story my journey and through the things that I've learned along the way having just some amazing mentors mind you I want to come into this space
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[SPEAKER_00]: not to talk at you, but to talk to you from the perspective of a mentor.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Someone who's done this, someone who's walked this path, someone who thousands and thousands of people have come to learn from, and millions and millions of people have listened to an podcast.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have a college education.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I still do not have that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have a litany of certifications.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have blah, blah, blah.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But what I do have is I have really experience.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And what I do have, okay, that's not true.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I do have thirty certifications.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So that's true.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But I don't have these like college.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I went to Yale and Duke and all this stuff, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: But here I am.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so I wanted to just create that context so you know what you're getting into and I wanted to just go into it right now and tell you this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Not giving up is the hardest thing that you will ever do.
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[SPEAKER_00]: How do I know?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because when I was twenty-six, I attempted.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Now, because of YouTube, I don't want to have to get it kicked off, but you know what I attempted.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You know what this means.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I had done the same thing when I was fourteen years old.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And when I look at my life today, now heading towards forty, I would never, ever do that again.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Why?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because I realized that not giving up isn't actually about me.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm going to say this because I know some people understand that some people won't.
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[SPEAKER_00]: When someone does something so drastic, generally speaking, it is the most selfish thing that they can do.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Why?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because they're only thinking about the consequences of themselves.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And again, I get it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't want to take that from people because life sucks sometimes.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Sometimes this journey is unbearably hard and you want to quit and you want to walk away and I understand.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But what happened for me is that I realized that I had to make my life about other people.
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[SPEAKER_00]: because then I would have purpose.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Then I would have something to do other than be in my own head all the time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And initially it wasn't, I'm going to go be a coach and an author and a speaker.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That was not it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: In the beginning it was, I'm going to go and serve my community.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to be a better brother.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to help my friends.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I mean, God, there's so many mistakes in the process of all that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Also, so many missteps, so many things that I wish I could do differently.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But I just kept going towards this idea that I had to put myself right in the context of what we're talking about into a position of working towards helping other people first.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I had to stop being self-fish.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I know that can sound counter because you're like, well, isn't the thing that you need coaching and therapy and books and podcasts and all those things?
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's yes and.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's yes and you need those things and you need to go be of service to other people because I can promise you, even at the lowest moment of your life, what you might be right now watching this, you have nothing to lose.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There's nothing but opportunity in front of you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And it's so difficult because when you're in this dark place, you know, sometimes you don't want to get out of bed.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Like sometimes you don't want to even talk to a friend.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You definitely don't want to go serve at a soup kitchen or be a big brother or go involuntary at a hospice.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You're at the nothingness of life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And I understand that place because I've been there.
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[SPEAKER_00]: In fact, that twenty-five years old
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[SPEAKER_00]: Literally the hardest thing for me was getting out of bed and brushing my teeth.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's real.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean there would be days I can't shower, I can't think straight, I can't operate, I'm barely holding on.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And you want me to go and help people?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, because that's the thing that pulled me out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Now, there's little things that we can do practically along the way, because being of service becomes an anchor, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is why a lot of people who go through AA and recovery, they end up becoming sponsors.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's why a lot of my peers, when we come through whether it be trauma or burnout or overwhelm or we learn how to solve this problem, we go and serve other people.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's the thing that's lacking in humanity in this digitally adapted society that we live in, where being a human is no longer analog and it's all digital.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's the missing piece of the puzzle.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is why depression rates are sky high.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is why people are deleting at a level
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[SPEAKER_00]: that is catastrophic.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is why people are more single and having less sex than ever.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's because we are so disconnected from one another.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so as you're sitting and you're watching this, again, I'm just hoping to guide you toward something here.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because when I started being a service and I started helping other people, my life got better because I had something to live for.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is the thing that we have to look at, living for something, living for someone is about taking that part of you that needs nourishment and going and nourishing other people and return getting nourished.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I will say this because it's just true.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Anyone else who disagrees with me, I would love to talk to them because I will call them a liar in the kindest way to their face.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I never feel more better about myself than when I am finished volunteering.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There's just no question about it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I never feel better.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing brings me more internal joy than going and being of service to people.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay, that's great.
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[SPEAKER_00]: But what if I can't even get out of bed?
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[SPEAKER_00]: All right, fair question.
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[SPEAKER_00]: What if you can't get out of bed?
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have to make a decision.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You see, life is about what I look at called the three A's.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Awareness, acceptance, action.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Awareness, acceptance, action.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Very simple.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Once you have awareness,
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[SPEAKER_00]: You are bringing in all of your environment.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You're looking at what's happening.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You're taking inventory of all of your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is awareness.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It is in your periphery.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You see it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You fill it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You smell it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You taste it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You are aware of this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: then becomes acceptance.
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[SPEAKER_00]: This is the hard part because acceptance means not only like accountability in a lot of ways, but acceptance also means you sitting in the truth that this is your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Most people are depressed because they're stuck in the past or they're anxious because they're stuck in the future.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so we're constantly rumanating.
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[SPEAKER_00]: We miss this moment now, which is called being present.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So we bring our awareness into this moment of acceptance and then through acceptance, now we move to action.
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[SPEAKER_00]: An action becomes the state of movement because without it you entropy and that always leads to a disaster, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have to move.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Action is based in decision making.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And what's so fascinating about action in action not doing anything is also action.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You are also making a decision and doing a thing by not doing anything.
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[SPEAKER_00]: The lack of action does not make it void.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So now you're sitting in your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You're looking up this way.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Okay.
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[SPEAKER_00]: What do I actually do?
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[SPEAKER_00]: And most people, they want to do a one-eighty.
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[SPEAKER_00]: They want to go and take their entire life flip it on its head and be different today.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's not going to happen.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That doesn't work.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I've never seen it work.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know anyone who it works for.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It hasn't worked for me.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I've never seen it work for a client.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I've never seen it work for a friend.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Why?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because as humans, the thing that we do really effectively well is we take
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[SPEAKER_00]: all of the data and information that we bring in, and we build habit on top of it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And your thoughts based on the data become your habits and your habits become your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So if your habit is wake up in the morning, you smoke a joint, you lay in bed, scroll Instagram,
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[SPEAKER_00]: You are twenty five minutes late for work every day.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You can't pay your bills on time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You eat trash food.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You watch too many adult films.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You don't work out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: You have arguments with people in your life all the time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: So one and so forth.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And you're at this moment where you're like, I want to change everything.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Well, you don't have a foundational baseline to shift into a healthy change because all of your habits have created a lifestyle that's deeply unsettling and unpleasing.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so the idea that you would go, all right, I'm gonna flip my whole life on its head and be different today doesn't work because as a human you are habituated.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And so now you are habituated into your current lifestyle, the only way you get out of that is through the action.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And this is why I always tell people, it's like one step out of time, because when I really was at the lowest of the lows, I'm three hundred and fifty pounds, right?
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[SPEAKER_00]: Smoking two packs a day, drinking myself to sleep, high all day, all night, and the horrible relationship, financial problems, nothing is working.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And if I want to split my life upside down, every single time I tried it, it didn't work.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And then I figured out the cadence.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And as cliche as it sounds, it really has been one step out of time, one step at a time.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And this one step, for me, began very simply with creating a rigid structure in my life in a timeline that looked like this.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Wake up, get out of bed within ten minutes.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And sometimes it was turning, I'll be honest, get out of bed as soon as you're nearly possible, brush my teeth.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's it.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Everything about the transformation of my life that pulled me out of the space of wanting to delete and actually being here now, fifteen years later, started with one decision.
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[SPEAKER_00]: That's all.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It doesn't take a complete uprooting of your life to change your life.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And you hear people say this a lot.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Change only happens in the moment in which the pain of staying the same outweighs the pain of the change.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's where I was at twenty five into twenty six.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I just couldn't live like that any longer.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And that's where the decision came into play because I had the awareness.
15:35.616 --> 15:37.377
[SPEAKER_00]: Trust me, it was there.
15:37.698 --> 15:41.180
[SPEAKER_00]: You cannot avoid unbuying a bigger sized pants.
15:41.560 --> 15:42.401
[SPEAKER_00]: You cannot avoid.
15:42.681 --> 15:43.842
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm hung over again.
15:44.162 --> 15:45.063
[SPEAKER_00]: You cannot avoid.
15:45.323 --> 15:47.985
[SPEAKER_00]: You're girlfriend saying to you, you are a wall.
15:48.325 --> 15:49.826
[SPEAKER_00]: When are you going to let me in?
15:50.127 --> 15:56.011
[SPEAKER_00]: You cannot avoid the countless number of people that I hooked up with trying to feel something.
15:56.291 --> 15:58.373
[SPEAKER_00]: You can't avoid the workaholism.
15:58.413 --> 16:03.837
[SPEAKER_00]: You can't avoid the taking all of the things that are good about life and finding the bad.
16:03.877 --> 16:04.598
[SPEAKER_00]: You can't avoid that.
16:04.678 --> 16:06.579
[SPEAKER_00]: That is awareness at its finest.
16:07.240 --> 16:07.440
[SPEAKER_00]: Right?
16:08.767 --> 16:12.148
[SPEAKER_00]: The acceptance of all that was brutal.
16:13.169 --> 16:14.129
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to lie.
16:14.369 --> 16:15.030
[SPEAKER_00]: It was harsh.
16:15.350 --> 16:20.732
[SPEAKER_00]: It was disgustingly difficult because the acceptance of the means that I had to take responsibility.
16:21.312 --> 16:23.393
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I had drug addict alcoholic parents.
16:23.473 --> 16:24.834
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, my grandmother was racist.
16:24.874 --> 16:26.414
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I have a learning disability.
16:26.774 --> 16:31.216
[SPEAKER_00]: Yes, I had this and that and that and that and that and this all of its true.
16:31.556 --> 16:37.179
[SPEAKER_00]: Every single bit of it was true and it led me to this thing where I just realized like, so what?
16:38.392 --> 16:39.693
[SPEAKER_00]: So what if it's true?
16:40.093 --> 16:41.574
[SPEAKER_00]: So what if I come from nothing?
16:41.674 --> 16:45.137
[SPEAKER_00]: So what if this is the worst thing that anyone could ever go through?
16:45.237 --> 16:46.078
[SPEAKER_00]: Who cares?
16:46.838 --> 16:48.199
[SPEAKER_00]: What am I going to do about it?
16:48.399 --> 16:49.540
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I can't change it.
16:50.381 --> 16:56.665
[SPEAKER_00]: There's nothing else that I can do because I've let it lead me to this moment where this is my life.
16:57.286 --> 16:58.667
[SPEAKER_00]: And so all of these things happen.
16:58.787 --> 16:59.527
[SPEAKER_00]: Let me this moment.
16:59.607 --> 17:00.168
[SPEAKER_00]: This is my life.
17:00.208 --> 17:01.128
[SPEAKER_00]: My life as a disaster.
17:01.148 --> 17:03.250
[SPEAKER_00]: I cannot figure out why acceptance.
17:04.574 --> 17:07.715
[SPEAKER_00]: I accept that my decisions brought me here.
17:08.315 --> 17:16.817
[SPEAKER_00]: No one else mind you, and that's a hard thing because when you accept that it would you and not them, it's personal responsibility and that means it's on you from here to change.
17:18.018 --> 17:19.238
[SPEAKER_00]: And then finally the action.
17:20.458 --> 17:27.460
[SPEAKER_00]: I just had to look at my life through both of these frames of awareness and acceptance and decide to take different actions.
17:28.341 --> 17:29.061
[SPEAKER_00]: And it took years.
17:30.123 --> 17:34.487
[SPEAKER_00]: the first four years of this journey, twenty six to thirty.
17:34.507 --> 17:37.250
[SPEAKER_00]: Oh God, they were so difficult.
17:38.028 --> 17:40.169
[SPEAKER_00]: They were impossibly difficult at times.
17:40.509 --> 17:42.570
[SPEAKER_00]: There were so many times I still wanted to quit.
17:42.930 --> 17:44.731
[SPEAKER_00]: So many times I still wanted to give up.
17:45.071 --> 17:50.113
[SPEAKER_00]: So many times that I wanted to walk away from all of it and disappear and never return.
17:50.453 --> 17:53.235
[SPEAKER_00]: There were so many times where I'm like, why am I in therapy?
17:53.495 --> 17:54.855
[SPEAKER_00]: Why am I reading this book?
17:55.215 --> 17:57.336
[SPEAKER_00]: Why am I watching this online course?
17:57.416 --> 17:58.577
[SPEAKER_00]: Why am I doing these things?
17:58.737 --> 17:59.837
[SPEAKER_00]: Nothing is working.
18:00.598 --> 18:05.360
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I realized it was this domino effect where it was like one
18:06.338 --> 18:08.920
[SPEAKER_00]: two, three, four.
18:09.200 --> 18:15.785
[SPEAKER_00]: And as I kept falling, it started painting this picture where this picture of me started to unravel and unveil itself.
18:16.085 --> 18:19.708
[SPEAKER_00]: And I could see the work coming to pass.
18:21.409 --> 18:22.910
[SPEAKER_00]: And it all started with the one decision.
18:22.930 --> 18:26.253
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm going to get out of bed as soon as you can possibly brush my teeth.
18:26.993 --> 18:28.854
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to make my bed.
18:29.494 --> 18:31.335
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to put the clothes away.
18:31.695 --> 18:33.916
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to take care of the home.
18:34.276 --> 18:37.137
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to take care of my physical body.
18:37.697 --> 18:39.418
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to change my diet.
18:39.458 --> 18:41.339
[SPEAKER_00]: And then I'm going to change what I consume.
18:41.739 --> 18:44.940
[SPEAKER_00]: And not only in my mouth, but in my ears and in my eyes.
18:45.801 --> 18:46.601
[SPEAKER_00]: Yo, it's crazy.
18:46.641 --> 18:52.243
[SPEAKER_00]: I grew up listening to like three, six mafia and to project Pat and T.I.
18:52.263 --> 18:53.124
[SPEAKER_00]: and all of these guys.
18:53.624 --> 18:56.505
[SPEAKER_00]: And I realized it was negatively influencing me.
18:57.644 --> 19:02.167
[SPEAKER_00]: And I was listening in this hardcore, new metal core and limp biscuit.
19:03.208 --> 19:04.508
[SPEAKER_00]: That stuff is impacting me.
19:04.789 --> 19:07.270
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm watching these horrible, horrible films all the time.
19:07.450 --> 19:10.312
[SPEAKER_00]: I love movies, but some of them were really dark.
19:10.672 --> 19:12.994
[SPEAKER_00]: Nobody should watch a jar head like six times.
19:13.294 --> 19:16.176
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm just saying, like it's a phenomenal film, but it's sad.
19:16.196 --> 19:16.936
[SPEAKER_00]: It's depressing.
19:16.996 --> 19:18.037
[SPEAKER_00]: It's angst filled.
19:19.818 --> 19:21.219
[SPEAKER_00]: Here I am in this moment.
19:21.239 --> 19:24.020
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm realizing it's just like bit by bit by bit.
19:24.120 --> 19:31.283
[SPEAKER_00]: And it all came through the awareness of looking at the truth of life and being like, okay, does this suit me any longer?
19:32.564 --> 19:34.465
[SPEAKER_00]: And if it doesn't, you make a decision.
19:34.485 --> 19:36.746
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's all this is.
19:38.126 --> 19:48.851
[SPEAKER_00]: You have to let go of the expectation that you have on yourself, that you have to continue to be the person that you were.
19:50.955 --> 20:02.722
[SPEAKER_00]: You have to let go of the expectation that you have on yourself that you are required to continue to be the person that you were.
20:04.262 --> 20:05.963
[SPEAKER_00]: That's where freedom begins.
20:07.384 --> 20:09.765
[SPEAKER_00]: That's where your life begins to change.
20:10.326 --> 20:17.850
[SPEAKER_00]: That's the moment where you pull back and you look at this and you say to yourself, I'm allowed to be different.
20:19.161 --> 20:28.743
[SPEAKER_00]: And if you allow yourself to be different, that means that you have something to push towards, that means you have something that you can strive towards creating and building.
20:29.383 --> 20:31.183
[SPEAKER_00]: And so you don't have to quit.
20:31.744 --> 20:35.444
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't have to give up when you have something that pulls you forward.
20:36.625 --> 20:48.607
[SPEAKER_00]: And I think that's the thing that we're missing often when we're in this space of the rock bottom, of the pain, of the resistance, of the life isn't working, of nothing matters, of the apathy, of all of it.
20:50.087 --> 20:54.151
[SPEAKER_00]: You just have to decide to push toward something different.
20:54.871 --> 21:11.887
[SPEAKER_00]: And I get it, you might be in the worst possible position in life, imaginable, homeless, car repode, no money, no friends, no partner, no relationships, nothing.
21:13.248 --> 21:14.729
[SPEAKER_00]: I have been there.
21:16.603 --> 21:27.434
[SPEAKER_00]: and I'm telling you, if you make a decision and you force yourself through the path of discomfort of self-discovery, that will change.
21:28.495 --> 21:29.516
[SPEAKER_00]: And here's why.
21:30.517 --> 21:36.043
[SPEAKER_00]: Because at this point, you don't have anything to lose anyway.
21:36.743 --> 21:38.005
[SPEAKER_00]: Now let's say it's different.
21:39.435 --> 21:40.616
[SPEAKER_00]: You have the family.
21:41.076 --> 21:42.477
[SPEAKER_00]: You have the husband or wife.
21:42.797 --> 21:43.778
[SPEAKER_00]: You have the children.
21:44.038 --> 21:45.799
[SPEAKER_00]: You have the amazing career.
21:46.340 --> 21:49.382
[SPEAKER_00]: You have all the things that everyone told you that you should have.
21:50.042 --> 21:53.664
[SPEAKER_00]: And yet you are still sitting here thinking about quitting and giving up.
21:55.145 --> 21:56.727
[SPEAKER_00]: You have to understand this part.
21:57.167 --> 21:57.907
[SPEAKER_00]: And this is just true.
21:58.288 --> 21:59.428
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't have the wife and kids.
21:59.749 --> 22:00.329
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not true.
22:01.103 --> 22:02.083
[SPEAKER_00]: I have an amazing career.
22:02.104 --> 22:08.286
[SPEAKER_00]: I have all the things people always said that you should have that if you're going to be happy and I felt the deep sense of unhappiness.
22:08.707 --> 22:11.048
[SPEAKER_00]: I felt the deep sense of unfulfillment.
22:11.308 --> 22:14.249
[SPEAKER_00]: I felt the deep sense of what am I doing with my life.
22:15.230 --> 22:30.377
[SPEAKER_00]: And the thing that happened that brought me back to me was going and serving something at a deeper level and and doing something else that fulfills my creative need to have fun.
22:31.857 --> 22:33.658
[SPEAKER_00]: I think life is very serious right now.
22:34.259 --> 22:35.620
[SPEAKER_00]: And we have forgotten how to have fun.
22:35.840 --> 22:38.402
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm not talking about like playing video games or watching movies.
22:38.442 --> 22:39.783
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm talking about creating.
22:40.323 --> 22:41.925
[SPEAKER_00]: So I started playing drums again.
22:42.485 --> 22:43.426
[SPEAKER_00]: That fills me up.
22:43.466 --> 22:44.767
[SPEAKER_00]: That's something I did as a kid.
22:45.027 --> 22:49.930
[SPEAKER_00]: I started making art again, drawing and making tattoos because I always love doing it.
22:50.271 --> 22:55.034
[SPEAKER_00]: I started doing all the things where people, you know, where people say this, they say,
22:56.315 --> 22:59.136
[SPEAKER_00]: If you could do anything in the world and not get paid, what would you do?
22:59.777 --> 23:02.177
[SPEAKER_00]: And I realize it's the things that make me happy.
23:02.918 --> 23:07.099
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's what we forget when we chase the money and the success and all those things.
23:07.460 --> 23:24.927
[SPEAKER_00]: And this is why we have these people who they're billionaires and they build massive empires and structures and companies or they're what we see as the best dad and mom in the world and they're always giving, giving, giving, giving, but they're not receiving and taking and then they end up taking their own.
23:25.707 --> 23:25.927
[SPEAKER_00]: Right?
23:25.987 --> 23:39.098
[SPEAKER_00]: And so I think the thing that you have to understand is that a big part of this is also seeking that internal fulfillment that makes you happy, that brings you joy, that makes you feel like things matter.
23:39.999 --> 23:52.870
[SPEAKER_00]: And so as you continue to walk down this path, I just hope that you understand the reality that giving up is a viable option.
23:54.263 --> 23:56.144
[SPEAKER_00]: But it might not be the right option.
23:57.065 --> 23:59.266
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's what I hope that you understand here.
23:59.806 --> 24:01.728
[SPEAKER_00]: Because I'm not going to take it away from people.
24:02.308 --> 24:03.389
[SPEAKER_00]: And it's dark.
24:03.749 --> 24:05.270
[SPEAKER_00]: You know, it's dark.
24:06.190 --> 24:08.352
[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, I remember I sat down and I wrote that note.
24:09.192 --> 24:11.314
[SPEAKER_00]: I wrote that note when I was twenty-five years old.
24:11.574 --> 24:12.494
[SPEAKER_00]: And that was dark.
24:14.916 --> 24:15.916
[SPEAKER_00]: And I understand.
24:18.138 --> 24:23.021
[SPEAKER_00]: And I just think to myself, every single day, I'm so glad that moment went differently.
24:24.284 --> 24:27.266
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not that life isn't harder or easier.
24:27.366 --> 24:28.606
[SPEAKER_00]: It's kind of still just life.
24:29.106 --> 24:31.868
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not that some things haven't been good and some things haven't been bad.
24:32.248 --> 24:33.048
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just life.
24:34.009 --> 24:46.275
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just that the truth of the reality is like as I sit here with you right now in this moment, I feel like all of the pain and suffering was worth it.
24:47.348 --> 24:56.271
[SPEAKER_00]: And even where I'm at now, the books, the awards, the podcasts, the, I still have not yet fully tapped into my potential.
24:57.058 --> 24:59.579
[SPEAKER_00]: And so there's still a big part of me that's seeking more.
25:00.079 --> 25:03.459
[SPEAKER_00]: There's still a big part of me that desires to be of better service.
25:03.999 --> 25:05.140
[SPEAKER_00]: That's where this came from.
25:05.900 --> 25:07.580
[SPEAKER_00]: That's why I'm creating this content.
25:07.620 --> 25:12.041
[SPEAKER_00]: That's why I'm sitting with you, hopefully as a friend and a mentor.
25:12.441 --> 25:18.863
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm only sharing my story and showing you the way that I did it and the same way that I've helped others do it.
25:19.463 --> 25:21.323
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'll leave you with this.
25:23.704 --> 25:24.844
[SPEAKER_00]: You can do this.
25:26.752 --> 25:28.873
[SPEAKER_00]: Like you can do that.
25:28.993 --> 25:33.695
[SPEAKER_00]: Like I'm telling you, you are fully capable of doing this.
25:35.195 --> 25:36.636
[SPEAKER_00]: Now it becomes about decision.
25:36.896 --> 25:38.657
[SPEAKER_00]: That action piece of the puzzle.
25:39.497 --> 25:40.678
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's what I would suggest to you.
25:41.418 --> 25:51.022
[SPEAKER_00]: If I were you, and I was watching this, and I was in a dark place right now, what I would do first and foremost is I would seek help in the deepest sense of it.
25:51.402 --> 25:53.663
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'm not talking about your friends or your husband or wife.
25:54.674 --> 25:57.094
[SPEAKER_00]: Definitely not your kids and certainly know when you work with.
25:57.495 --> 25:58.715
[SPEAKER_00]: I would go seek professional help.
25:58.895 --> 25:59.775
[SPEAKER_00]: I would do it immediately.
25:59.795 --> 26:01.175
[SPEAKER_00]: I would call the hotline.
26:02.135 --> 26:03.536
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll put the link in the description.
26:03.556 --> 26:04.776
[SPEAKER_00]: I'll put the phone number description.
26:05.176 --> 26:05.756
[SPEAKER_00]: Call the hotline.
26:07.056 --> 26:10.217
[SPEAKER_00]: I would then depending on where I'm at.
26:10.697 --> 26:12.397
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe I'm not that far gone.
26:12.437 --> 26:13.518
[SPEAKER_00]: Maybe that's not where I'm at.
26:13.998 --> 26:16.558
[SPEAKER_00]: But I'm at this place where just that rumination is there.
26:16.878 --> 26:18.298
[SPEAKER_00]: The ideations are there.
26:18.639 --> 26:20.799
[SPEAKER_00]: The thought pops up of not existing.
26:21.700 --> 26:33.510
[SPEAKER_00]: I would grab a journal, a physical piece of paper and a pin, and I would write down all of the ways in the world that the world is not going to be as good without me here.
26:34.171 --> 26:38.554
[SPEAKER_00]: And I know one of you just now thought to yourselves, well, the world will be better if I'm gone.
26:38.855 --> 26:39.755
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, that's a lie.
26:40.596 --> 26:47.282
[SPEAKER_00]: And that's a lie that you're telling yourself, because that's not true, because I can tell you right now someone.
26:47.482 --> 26:49.544
[SPEAKER_00]: Here's a secret that I learned a long time ago.
26:51.187 --> 26:53.307
[SPEAKER_00]: You don't know this because you're not aware enough.
26:54.548 --> 27:04.810
[SPEAKER_00]: Someone in your life directly or indirectly is watching everything that you do and they want you to win.
27:06.210 --> 27:08.430
[SPEAKER_00]: They want to see you be successful.
27:08.690 --> 27:11.851
[SPEAKER_00]: They want to watch you pull yourself out of where you are.
27:13.251 --> 27:17.152
[SPEAKER_00]: And I know that that can feel far fetching like, well, what then do I bring?
27:17.978 --> 27:19.319
[SPEAKER_00]: Well, that's what you have to sit down.
27:19.379 --> 27:31.589
[SPEAKER_00]: Your gifts, the thing that is inside of you, your talent, your ability to connect your, your love, your joy, your pat, whatever that thing is, that is for you to give to the world.
27:31.609 --> 27:33.791
[SPEAKER_00]: And I would argue you're not doing it right now.
27:34.171 --> 27:36.173
[SPEAKER_00]: In fact, I could probably guarantee it.
27:36.773 --> 27:38.795
[SPEAKER_00]: And so the thing that you have to do is go and give.
27:38.835 --> 27:44.460
[SPEAKER_00]: So grab that notebook, a piece of paper, a pen, and just write down all the ways that you can give.
27:45.198 --> 27:46.399
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's not take right now.
27:47.059 --> 27:47.800
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's go and give.
27:47.820 --> 27:49.241
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's go be of service.
27:49.941 --> 27:54.844
[SPEAKER_00]: What this is really about, by the way, is human connection.
27:55.765 --> 28:01.088
[SPEAKER_00]: This is about you connecting to another human being on a deep level.
28:02.951 --> 28:05.654
[SPEAKER_00]: That helps you not feel alone.
28:06.095 --> 28:16.385
[SPEAKER_00]: This is why go to the soup kitchen, go to the hospital, go to the elementary school, go to wherever it is that you can volunteer and go volunteer.
28:17.987 --> 28:19.428
[SPEAKER_00]: They need your help, by the way.
28:20.530 --> 28:24.454
[SPEAKER_00]: In the thing that will happen, it will start to fill you up because you're being human.
28:25.677 --> 28:36.801
[SPEAKER_00]: Being at home alone, depressed, in your underwear, eating peanut butter, watching cartoons, smoking jays, watching adult films, on your phone, all day is doing the scrolling.
28:37.601 --> 28:38.401
[SPEAKER_00]: That's not living.
28:39.482 --> 28:40.282
[SPEAKER_00]: It's just not.
28:41.642 --> 28:44.403
[SPEAKER_00]: And again, this all begins with a shift of your pattern.
28:44.463 --> 28:47.124
[SPEAKER_00]: So it's about identifying those places you can serve.
28:48.025 --> 28:55.027
[SPEAKER_00]: Then what you're going to do on another page is you're going to write, because again, we have to have awareness.
28:55.810 --> 29:01.654
[SPEAKER_00]: You're going to write all of the things that you're doing in your life that do not make your life better.
29:03.235 --> 29:07.078
[SPEAKER_00]: And then the important part of this, you're not going to beat yourself up.
29:08.379 --> 29:09.619
[SPEAKER_00]: Don't beat yourself up about it.
29:09.700 --> 29:10.780
[SPEAKER_00]: It's not going to help anyway.
29:11.121 --> 29:11.621
[SPEAKER_00]: You know this.
29:11.661 --> 29:12.341
[SPEAKER_00]: You've already done it.
29:12.401 --> 29:13.242
[SPEAKER_00]: It didn't help before.
29:13.282 --> 29:14.103
[SPEAKER_00]: Why would it help now?
29:15.083 --> 29:17.405
[SPEAKER_00]: You're just simply looking at truth.
29:18.726 --> 29:20.327
[SPEAKER_00]: This is the acceptance part.
29:21.608 --> 29:24.770
[SPEAKER_00]: And then on one more page, this is the action part.
29:25.998 --> 29:35.443
[SPEAKER_00]: All you're simply going to do is write one sentence about one thing that you are willing to start changing immediately.
29:36.724 --> 29:42.287
[SPEAKER_00]: And I'll be honest with you, to be like, I'm not gonna smoke cigarettes anymore and you've been smoking two packs for ten years.
29:43.608 --> 29:44.549
[SPEAKER_00]: It's a hard sell.
29:44.569 --> 29:45.909
[SPEAKER_00]: I think it'd be a tough one.
29:46.290 --> 29:47.290
[SPEAKER_00]: I don't know that that works.
29:47.310 --> 29:48.171
[SPEAKER_00]: It didn't work for me.
29:48.411 --> 29:49.912
[SPEAKER_00]: All right, I had to taper through that.
29:50.652 --> 29:55.335
[SPEAKER_00]: But one thing that could work very simply here in me on this,
29:56.215 --> 29:58.378
[SPEAKER_00]: I'm not going to drink Coca-Cola today.
29:59.779 --> 30:00.260
[SPEAKER_00]: Very simple.
30:00.380 --> 30:02.622
[SPEAKER_00]: Today, we're just trying to make it through today.
30:03.403 --> 30:06.607
[SPEAKER_00]: Let's get today settled, worry about tomorrow tomorrow.
30:07.508 --> 30:09.731
[SPEAKER_00]: And I want you to know, you matter.
30:10.512 --> 30:11.733
[SPEAKER_00]: You are important.
30:13.795 --> 30:16.779
[SPEAKER_00]: You are a person that the world is better with.
30:17.453 --> 30:35.176
[SPEAKER_00]: because you exist and I know it doesn't always feel like that and I know that this can feel so incredibly difficult and so unbelievably unfair but you matter a promise you because look here's a truth if I didn't believe that I wouldn't even make this video
30:35.895 --> 30:37.176
[SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't make this content.
30:37.196 --> 30:38.256
[SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't have written the books.
30:38.296 --> 30:52.684
[SPEAKER_00]: I wouldn't try to help people because I've seen the power and the ability that people like you have to transform everything and so I invite you to do that.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And the last thing that I'll say, I have a free community that you can join for people like you.
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[SPEAKER_00]: People like me are just trying to live a life that's different, to heal, to overcome, to be able to sustain, to be seen, to be heard, to be able to have contribution and to contribute.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And all you have to do, there's a link below in the description.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Click that link, come and join the community.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's absolutely free.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I mean, we got all kinds of stuff in there.
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[SPEAKER_00]: It's a new community, so it'll grow, but today it's free, and it's zero dollars, and it's just a place for you to come and hang out.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Because you matter, you're important.
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[SPEAKER_00]: There's no reason for you to be alone.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Thank you for being here.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Take care of yourself.
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[SPEAKER_00]: Take care of each other.
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[SPEAKER_00]: And until next time I friend, you be unbroken.
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[SPEAKER_00]: I'll see you soon.